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Astanley

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Status Updates posted by Astanley

  1. Astanley

    For a limited time only , I am putting my dog at stud , £1,000 ,only to approved bitches.

    1. paulus

      paulus

      topical.....lol

    2. Astanley

      Astanley

      I have now taken 10 bookings so he is no longer at open stud

    3. pip1968

      pip1968

      stan is this the same dog you had done pmsl

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  2. Astanley

    Another old mate struck down with that fekin cancer ,what a cruel bastid of a disease that is ,

    1. air gun ant

      air gun ant

      sorry to hear it mate

    2. youcanthide...BANG

      youcanthide...BANG

      Lost my nannan to lung cancer, its terrible how they deteriorate right in front of you and your helpless to do anything

    3. Her ferreter

      Her ferreter

      Sorry to hear that mate.

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  3. Astanley

    A good thread locked because of some mod fixated , shite spouting weirdo

  4. Astanley

    I,m definatly on here too much , just spoke to a mate on the phone and called him butty...ffs........

    1. foxtails

      foxtails

      nothing wrong with that but !

    2. rob190364

      rob190364

      I had never ever written or said the words bud or feck until I joined this forum!!!!

    3. johnny boy68

      johnny boy68

      Nice one butty !! lol

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  5. Astanley

    Swansea are looking good , I think it will be another good year for them

    1. Malt

      Malt

      Aye, 3-0 up, just checked..

    2. PIL

      PIL

      Watched their story last night , they've come a long way in football terms .

  6. Astanley

    BBC Alba , I don,t know what they are saying , but they play some fekin decent music on there .

  7. Astanley

    Feeling good this morning

    1. johnny boy68

      johnny boy68

      Stan's DIY colonic irrigation :-)

    2. pip1968

      pip1968

      pheeww thank f**k i can put the suit away now lol

    3. paulus

      paulus

      Ok Milton Man.........lol

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  8. Astanley

    You know your getting old when you look at old photos and your the only one still alive on lots of them.

    1. scothunter

      scothunter

      lol

    2. Outlaw Pete

      Outlaw Pete

      Yep. When you realise you're Billy No Mates. Because they're all f**king dead! :o

       

    3. Ideation

      Ideation

      I'm 28 and I get that now sometimes!

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  9. Astanley

    I,v just had a conversation with a woman outside a knocking shop , or I tried to , I was fascinated by her hand , it kept touching my groin area

    1. pip1968

      pip1968

      it wasnt kay was it lol

    2. reaper1064

      reaper1064

      nice one

  10. Astanley

    my mate just got a job in london ,he asked me the best place for digs ,i told him to go to the eastend and call gnasher a kunt

    1. walshie

      walshie

      Did you mis-hear him and think he asked for gay slaps?

    2. stewie

      stewie

      lol!!!

  11. Astanley

    I stayed up all last night to see where the sun went ,,,then it dawned on me

  12. Astanley

    pms jokes are not funny , period.

    1. Lab

      Lab

      Correct....anyone who bleeds for a week and doesn't die is not funny in the slightest!!!

    2. Astanley

      Astanley

      pmsl

  13. Astanley

    Met a girl who said she recognised me from the vegitarian club , but I,d never seen herbivore

    1. fatasafool

      fatasafool

      Like it

    2. Lab

      Lab

      reported.

  14. Astanley

    When chemists die , do they barium ?

  15. Astanley

    They,re not big and they,re not clever .

    1. johnny boy68

      johnny boy68

      Fck off you bullys....you're only jealous because I can go up on girls.lol

    2. Lab

      Lab

      Chid and Malt?

    3. albert64

      albert64

      we'll soon have seven then all we need is snow white, dont think we'll find one of them on here

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  16. Astanley

    Sciatica ,,what a b*****d .

    1. pip1968

      pip1968

      get on the green

    2. Astanley

      Astanley

      thanks for that mate , I,ll try it cheers

    3. pip1968

      pip1968

      i gave it to me dad who had cancer he said it was the best sleep he ever had

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  17. Astanley

    I AM NOT A WOMAN .I was having a laugh , I don,t want to go on a date , so stop pm,ing me Lab

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. albert64

      albert64

      he used to send me pm's like that

    3. atuddy

      atuddy

      hahahahahahahaha

    4. chris k

      chris k

      didnt relise that lab was choosey between sex's

    5. Show next comments  6 more
  18. Astanley

    Its weather like this when you need a man to keep you warm.

    1. Malt

      Malt

      Or a pair of balls and a five o clock shadow...

    2. .WARREN.

      .WARREN.

      get a hot water bottle

    3. nothernlite

      nothernlite

      you still looking for your 3rd husband ?

    4. Show next comments  6 more
  19. Astanley

    My libido is out of control yiiiiikkkkeeess

    1. BOLSTER

      BOLSTER

      PM Earth he'll take care for you !

       

    2. rob190364

      rob190364

      not another attention seeking snatch...why do they come on here??

    3. christian71

      christian71

      Well guessing what you just said rob and all your numbers..........To attention seek :-)

    4. Show next comments  6 more
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