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abarrett

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Everything posted by abarrett

  1. abarrett
    Ring them up tell them how sorry you are but its a bit embarrassing Then tell them you can't read you understand numbers a bit but you need someone to read for you You asked a passerby how much to park and you where told free And it didn't dawn on you that you would need a ticket Good luck
  2. abarrett
    cant remember the name jjm, do you remember years ago you used to get the toffee in a rectangular slab, you had to break it up with a small hammer, we used to get it on the local market. quare stuff that was, never tasted toffee like it since. Blue bird toffee
  3. abarrett
    I don't know how true this is I was told it happened to a mate of a mate Police turned up at his house having made an appointment to check guns and security They arrived early and his mrs let them in and told them he would be back in 15 mins They asked if she had the keys for the cabinet so they could make a start She gave them the keys The lad turns up to his guns being removed Because he allowed unauthorised access to a firearm
  4. abarrett
    Mrs had a new skirt put it on and asked Does this make my bum big No baby I says That will be the chips and cakes
  5. abarrett
    I wouldn't buy anything I couldn't say in one breath
  6. abarrett
    Stun pellets fantastic When they die and she asks why Tell her it must of bumped its head after it fell When you stunned it lol
  7. abarrett
    I hope they have a good laugh about it Some one hears them Them beats the living daylights out them
  8. abarrett
    I had some bloke from India or that way on asking about telephone contracts And who I was with British telecom I said Well said the lad my name is Darren and I can save you money I asked him where they where based Er er man er chesertry Ok I said if you can tell me what the weather is doing outside the window I will listen to you Then I got Tap tap tap its sunshine with a chance of a shower with light South east breeze You can't say they don't try
  9. abarrett
    Done and passed on
  10. abarrett
    A football ground or an old barracks armed guards on the gate All the drugs that have been seized over the years on a table in the middle Big sign saying FREE DRUGS Let um come the only rule being to leave you need to test clear Put it live on TV That will solve the problem
  11. abarrett
    I would buy a big helicopter fill it with Old fridges,conifers,gas bottles and dogs shite Then do a bit of air born fly tipping Returning it to its rightful owners
  12. abarrett
    .22 shorts
  13. abarrett
    Could of been worse he could have gone through Wearing a maroon beret with a Union Jack on the aerial
  14. abarrett
    On the down side you have to send your ticket off to get the piece of shite taken off Before you can buy again
  15. abarrett
    Take it back n beat him with it That will need a new barrel at best Don't keep that even if he gives it to you Bet the inside of the mods the same
  16. abarrett
    Let's start the hatstand owners club I've had mine 4 years now It's a bit hit n miss It misfires if it's cleaned to much But it's not a bad gun for the money I gave £200 for mine brand new I believe you get what you pay for so can't complain
  17. abarrett
    Let's hope cat fur takes off
  18. abarrett
    Brass ?
  19. abarrett
    Now we are getting some where Release the rat Kill the cat then burn it in case it ain't dead And any pictures of them shitting lezzers
  20. abarrett
    I wonder if rat fur might catch on Might start freezing them just in case I would be good if some one took fox It's a shame to leave a good big winter fox in the hedge bottom
  21. abarrett
    Went on a stag do a couple of weeks ago Went to doveridge shooting ground for the clays Then the go cart track 50 lap race ( worst thing I have ever done) Then camped it next to chase water lake big fire loads of beer Great day
  22. abarrett
    Kind of heartbeat related fact Bellamy is married to Janice of Benidorm No one has mentioned the ginger one
  23. abarrett
    The landlord is just covering him self I bet it doesn't say on the letter that regular checks will be carried out Because he can't Take no notice what he don't know won't hurt him Good luck
  24. abarrett
    How about this one As above called lamped,called lamped , here he comes Just in the perfect position for the shot When a third party who was there for a look Took out a hanky as big as a bath towel Shook it the blew his nose
  25. abarrett
    Just ask for the money
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