Liverpool

[blackmaggie 3,375]

21 hours ago, WILF said:

My lad is funny, he can follow instruction for Lego or puzzles all by himself and you won’t get a peep out of him for hours but if he has to start making multiple choices in a social situation the old brain frazzles! Lol 

mine hasnt got the patience for lego we would end up with it all over i would love to take him on a game but he could cope with the crowds and noise hes grand in small groups or if he thinks everyone watching him he begins to lose it  

[WILF 44,334]

15 minutes ago, blackmaggie said:

mine hasnt got the patience for lego we would end up with it all over i would love to take him on a game but he could cope with the crowds and noise hes grand in small groups or if he thinks everyone watching him he begins to lose it  

Yep, I know exactly what you are talking about mate.

[jukel123 6,570]

22 hours ago, WILF said:

Parents can be the worst mate, for a start most of them have absolutely no concept about the fact that’s it’s NOT about winning football matches at junior level.

Then of course you have the parent who never volunteers or gives up his time to coach or even help, more over you can see they have never played the game in any sort of serious way but come the match.....they are Johan Cruyff !! 
 

You give your kids a set of ideas, tell them to focus on certain things in the game, encourage them and there’s this prat screaming at his kid from the side lines to do this or do that.......poor little fuckers don’t know where they are.

The collective groan when you give the kids (who may not have the same level of ability as “the best” players ) their fair share of game time......it’s f***ing horrible mate.

I can hand on heart say I never pushed my boy to play football, I let him discover it by himself.

Even this season he lost a bit of enthusiasm and confidence with the game and said “I want to pack up!” So I said “fine” and let him do it.

After about a month I said “what’s the problem” so he told me and I explained that he was just focusing on the wrong things, worrying about winning when he should just focus on his own game and being a good example to players around him.......I told him “You can’t play the whole game in every position, you just have to play your position and enjoy yourself by doing the best you can for others”

So, he thought about that for another 2 weeks then said “I want to go back” and he really enjoyed himself again......he was a different lad.

You can’t bully any player mate, never mind kids.....you have to be a bit more clever about things.

Its easy to smash people down, it’s building them up that’s hard.

 

Men who try and live their lives through their kids are 100% arseholes. They always place their own masculine insecurities onto their sons. So many dads who encourage their sons to  become "hard men" have problems with their own masculinity. Leave the poor kids be who they are without judgement.

[gnasher16 29,664]

6 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

Men who try and live their lives through their kids are 100% arseholes. They always place their own masculine insecurities onto their sons. So many dads who encourage their sons to  become "hard men" have problems with their own masculinity. Leave the poor kids be who they are without judgement.

Fair comment i f****d up in that area....certainly nothing to do with being hard or masculine i just didnt want him making the same mistakes i made as a youngster.....but alas,as a weekend father we probably just wasnt close enough for him to accept my advice and i probably pushed him away from the game.....he still plays now but certainly not at the level he could have done but not everyone has that drive to be the best... i get it now its all too late !!

The type of fathers Wilf is on about i detest,loudmouthed f****n idiots screaming and shouting from the touchline having done nothing more than kick a ball round the playground themselves,shouting at referees etc....embarrassing.

[jukel123 6,570]

1 minute ago, gnasher16 said:

Fair comment i f****d up in that area....certainly nothing to do with being hard or masculine i just didnt want him making the same mistakes i made as a youngster.....but alas,as a weekend father we probably just wasnt close enough for him to accept my advice and i probably pushed him away from the game.....he still plays now but certainly not at the level he could have done but not everyone has that drive to be the best... i get it now its all too late !!

The type of fathers Wilf is on about i detest,loudmouthed f****n idiots screaming and shouting from the touchline having done nothing more than kick a ball round the playground themselves,shouting at referees etc....embarrassing.

I am not saying for one second I was a great dad. Made loads of mistakes. They remind me from time to time. It's part of the game to f**k up. This sounds big headed, but I quickly realised my boys weren't as athletic as I was when I was a kid.

I'm on about the loudmouthed f****n idiots too. I remember watching my son playing in goal for his school team. He gathered up a loose ball and some arsehole shouted at his son to " bear down on the keeper'. The lad did as he was told and went in two footed on my lad and injured him. Once I knew he was ok I had to leave, I couldn't cope with the loudmouth dad. I was white with anger.

[gnasher16 29,664]

9 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

I am not saying for one second I was a great dad. Made loads of mistakes. They remind me from time to time. It's part of the game to f**k up. This sounds big headed, but I quickly realised my boys weren't as athletic as I was when I was a kid.

I'm on about the loudmouthed f****n idiots too. I remember watching my son playing in goal for his school team. He gathered up a loose ball and some arsehole shouted at his son to " bear down on the keeper'. The lad did as he was told and went in two footed on my lad and injured him. Once I knew he was ok I had to leave, I couldn't cope with the loudmouth dad. I was white with anger.

My boy signed schoolby forms with the Orient,ok its only Orient but it showed he had the talent to become a pro....he just wasnt competitive enough,he enjoyed playing football with his mates and didnt have or want all the dedication that comes with being a sportsman......we have a decent relationship now and when we talk about players wages today he often gives me a wink and says " maybe you was right " 

They crack me up these parents with a great big derby hanging over their trackie bottoms giving out all the dialogue " double pivot "..." between the lines "...." play as a false nine "..................f**k off you idiot they are 8 years old !

[WILF 44,334]

1 hour ago, jukel123 said:

I am not saying for one second I was a great dad. Made loads of mistakes. They remind me from time to time. It's part of the game to f**k up. This sounds big headed, but I quickly realised my boys weren't as athletic as I was when I was a kid.

I'm on about the loudmouthed f****n idiots too. I remember watching my son playing in goal for his school team. He gathered up a loose ball and some arsehole shouted at his son to " bear down on the keeper'. The lad did as he was told and went in two footed on my lad and injured him. Once I knew he was ok I had to leave, I couldn't cope with the loudmouth dad. I was white with anger.

I have my own rule mate, if someone is getting out of hand I’d just stop the game and take my kids away.

Not has to do that as yet as normally a little whisper of “Here mate, shut up” is enough.

The stop the game rule is actually a proper rule in under age football in England and I think it’s a great rule to be honest.

[WILF 44,334]

Listen lads, we are all guilty of putting “our rules” on our kids and it’s a really hard thing to remember that they have not had to live our lives and they are their own people.

My lad is a big athletic unit and he was having a bit of bother in school with a couple of traveller lads so of course silly bollocks here says “hit em round the f***ing head with a chair and beat them with it until some body drags you off.....make sure they never want a bit of you again”

My lad looked horrified and he has a gentle nature which I love so all that turn out is never going to be a bit of him.....my wife said to me, he ain’t like that you f***ing idiot and she was right.

It got dealt with properly through the proper channels and that was best.

Point is lads, we all f**k up....we don’t mean to but we do BUT the main job is that on reflection we know we did and that’s a good thing.....we think next time instead of chopsing off. Lol  

[jukel123 6,570]

2 hours ago, gnasher16 said:

My boy signed schoolby forms with the Orient,ok its only Orient but it showed he had the talent to become a pro....he just wasnt competitive enough,he enjoyed playing football with his mates and didnt have or want all the dedication that comes with being a sportsman......we have a decent relationship now and when we talk about players wages today he often gives me a wink and says " maybe you was right " 

They crack me up these parents with a great big derby hanging over their trackie bottoms giving out all the dialogue " double pivot "..." between the lines "...." play as a false nine "..................f**k off you idiot they are 8 years old !

All the pros have got memories of trainees who were better than them ability- wise but just fell by the wayside because they didn't have that extra ambition/drive that they had. My mate had a son on Celtic's books but dropped out because he couldn't handle coaches shouting and swearing at him. It's the law of bugger.

[WILF 44,334]

Coaching youngsters teaches you a lot about yourself and it also forces you to use your canister.

Accepting that your boy isn’t the same as you mentality wise in some areas makes you a better person imho.....it has me I think.

I suppose it’s logic really, if you were the focused no quarter given headcase sporting wise and you know everyone used to look at you like “f***ing hell what’s with this bloke” then the odds of your kids being the same are minimal because only very few people are like that in reality.

And you have to realise that there’s loads of different ways to be “good” .......it’s not just your way.

Being a parent or a coach or anyone that works with young people should teach you that and it will if you have an open, thinking type of personality.

Theres a county side here, they call themselves and “academy” but they are really just a county side and it’s run by a big fat English bloke.....so fat in fact that he looks like he needs a sponge and stick to wipe his jacksy.

They go after all the “best” (in their opinion ) players every year and then hold open trials......it absolutely fucks all your hard work up from a team ethic point of view.

You get parent (and consequently child) ego creeping in, all the old “oh I got picked by the academy” and the “we dont need to take notice of you any more because we are in the academy” bollocks

You also get kids getting taken there by parents who shouldn’t take them there.....it’s gets built up to such a big deal that rejection can crush a kid.

He phoned me last year like he was doing me a favour and nearly choked on his biscuit when I said “I’m not sending you anyone, I have worked to hard to build my kids up to have people who only look for a certain style of player knock them down”

He don’t talk to me now ! Lol 

[WILF 44,334]

11 minutes ago, sid g said:

i coached kids sides at under 7s , 12s, and took a side from under 12 right through to seniors i used to have parents meetings to clear the air cant say i really had any issues my rules were no coaching from parents on the side lines and only words of encouragement if you dont like the way i do things take your son somewhere else but ask him first were he`d sooner play , i would`nt put up with verbals to the opposistions players or the ref from either players or parents , i remember only having 11 players one  under 14s game we conceded a free kick i was trying to get one player in the wall he whernt having it and told me to fook off i took him off and finished the game with 10 players  i was lucky in the sides i ran won things so the lads wanted to play for me .  these lads are in thr 30`s now and will come and shake my hand some still call me gaffer i`ve been to weddings and christenings and i`m godfather to 2 of ems kids so i must of got something right , 2 of em manage the 1st n res teams were they`ve played since they were 10 year old and still ring me for a bit of advice ....

That’s lovely that is mate, a bit of a legacy right there.

[gnasher16 29,664]

2 hours ago, WILF said:

 

The stop the game rule is actually a proper rule in under age football in England and I think it’s a great rule to be honest.

How does that work then Wilf ?.....for what sort of things is it,and do refs actually apply it ?

Thats interesting i didnt know that.

Edited December 20, 2019 by gnasher16

[jukel123 6,570]

Might be a snowflake but at kids level I like all kids to have a go even if they are crap. Winning is for later. Let them all enjoy the game.

[gnasher16 29,664]

1 hour ago, sid g said:

i coached kids sides at under 7s , 12s, and took a side from under 12 right through to seniors i used to have parents meetings to clear the air cant say i really had any issues my rules were no coaching from parents on the side lines and only words of encouragement if you dont like the way i do things take your son somewhere else but ask him first were he`d sooner play , i would`nt put up with verbals to the opposistions players or the ref from either players or parents , i remember only having 11 players one  under 14s game we conceded a free kick i was trying to get one player in the wall he whernt having it and told me to fook off i took him off and finished the game with 10 players  i was lucky in the sides i ran won things so the lads wanted to play for me .  these lads are in thr 30`s now and will come and shake my hand some still call me gaffer i`ve been to weddings and christenings and i`m godfather to 2 of ems kids so i must of got something right , 2 of em manage the 1st n res teams were they`ve played since they were 10 year old and still ring me for a bit of advice ....

Lovely to hear good for you.

I remember one game when my lad was about 10 or 11 for whatever reason the referee hadnt turned up  so i volunteered to do it.......that was probably the last time i ever gave referees abuse even on the telly ....bollocks to that !

[gnasher16 29,664]

4 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

Might be a snowflake but at kids level I like all kids to have a go even if they are crap. Winning is for later. Let them all enjoy the game.

I know in Holland they dont start competitive leagues until lads are 15 i think it is.....they dont even allow tackling until the same sort of age.

Not sure i agree with that mentality but you cant argue with the quality of player they produce so it obviously works.