socks 32,253 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 What do you think you will be or are ??? I was away a lot when my kids were growing up and missed a fair bit of their lives and I Realy have to to take my hat off to my missus in bringing up well rounded polite and trouble free kids ... When I was around I was always busy or stressed or tired and I feel deep down I could have been a better dad ... Now as I get older I am mellowing a lot and have more time I think I will be a much better grandfather with more time to do things with my grandkids when they come along .... How do you fellas feel ... are you better grandparents than you were parents or do you think you will be a better grandparent than parent .......... 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
runem 533 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 What do you think you will be or are ??? I was away a lot when my kids were growing up and missed a fair bit of their lives and I Realy have to to take my hat off to my missus in bringing up well rounded polite and trouble free kids ... When I was around I was always busy or stressed or tired and I feel deep down I could have been a better dad ... Now as I get older I am mellowing a lot and have more time I think I will be a much better grandfather with more time to do things with my grandkids when they come along .... How do you fellas feel ... are you better grandparents than you were parents or do you think you will be a better grandparent than parent .......... thats a bit heavy socks,whats brought that on, When i was very young a chap was about to retire,i asked any regrets he said:"i went to work and when i came home my kids had left home" i never forgot those words and i have no regrets. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MoChara 1,600 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 Socks, I hope I put this right otherwise it'll not make sense. I'd put money on it your children do not feel any different because you were away a lot. A lot worse fathers out there than ones working away etc. I won't go into my life story but I can tell you from my view, cause you were not around as much as you think you should have, they love you the same if you'd of been around all the time (they'd been sick of you lol) As I said you weren't bad to them as such, don't sound like your were an alcoholic or anything like that, lot worse out there than yourself. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself, your thread goes to show how much you cared about it. I reckon it'll be an interesting thread. Hope you get your grandchildren someday! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tb25 4,626 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 As a farther.. Am not the best.who is?.. But I try.for me since having my son and bringing up alone for just over a year now is how I have to really did deep and show my amoshenal side..I find that hard.I think am doing OK..before he came to me.I was a crap dad..woman drink and work came first and I didn't even no it..and I beat myself up most days about that..but me and my boy are doing fine..am sure your a good dad socks.better than most mate 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bosun11 537 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 I had my first child as most of my school mates became grandparents! To be honest i'm really happy about that, for me it's the right time in my life, i have no regrets, only the knowlage and expierence to try to do the very best by my daughter. Life's good, i'm relishing everyday as a parent. On the downside, maybe i'll never get to see my Grandchildren but thats not something i worry about, my job is to ensure my daughter becomes a happy, healthy, well rounded individual and lives the life she wants and if that goes to plan I know my Mrs is gonna be a very proud Grandmother. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 My nan once said my grandad done a lot more with us than he done with his own kids. Understandable really, apart from the first decade or so of my life he was retired. My stepdad was pretty good, until he started spending all his time in the pub. I stayed home with the youngest while the wife went back to work. Made sense because I was in and out of hospital having knee ops at the time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
neems 2,406 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 I had my first child as most of my school mates became grandparents! To be honest i'm really happy about that, for me it's the right time in my life, i have no regrets, only the knowlage and expierence to try to do the very best by my daughter. Life's good, i'm relishing everyday as a parent. On the downside, maybe i'll never get to see my Grandchildren but thats not something i worry about, my job is to ensure my daughter becomes a happy, healthy, well rounded individual and lives the life she wants and if that goes to plan I know my Mrs is gonna be a very proud Grandmother. we've had kids very young,the main reason being so we know we'll be there for them longer. my missus's parents had her old and were both dead by the time she was 14,she's never forgive them. the downside is being able to make money/have a career with such a huge ball and chain lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Accip74 7,112 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 My dad was always working away when I was a kid, not only wasn't he there a lot, he left me with a lot of responsibility for my age.......something that kind of back fired later on.... He will say he wanted to provide the best for his family & in a lot of ways thats true.....but I also knew he enjoyed the adventure & liked being away......I know one thing, I could of lived with a lot less if I'd had a lot more of him as a boy...... When my parents did finally separate & my dad 'officially' move away....I barely noticed him gone...haha... I'm a late starter with my family....almost 40 before I had the first, now another on the way :-)...... I'm a stay at home father & without doubt it's the best job I've ever had.....I feel it was the best time in life for me to have kids & I think I'm doing a very good job of being a father, I relish it every day :-).....it's almost a relief to be grounded at this stage in my life & actually know what I'll be doing for the next few years....:-) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tb25 4,626 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 That early morning kiss and love you.same before bed makes life worth living.. Am glad of all the f**k ups I done so I can hopefully keep mine on the right road. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jiggy 3,207 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 (edited) ...... Edited April 25, 2015 by jiggy Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 That early morning kiss and love you.same before bed makes life worth living.. Am glad of all the f**k ups I done so I can hopefully keep mine on the right road.Like you, I ain't led the perfect life mate. Think it makes it worse as a parent because you know what's out there sort of thing and what sort of trouble can be found. The problem with getting it across to your kids is that sooner or later they're going to go their own way and make their own mistakes anyway, irrespective of the solid advice you've been giving to them all their lives. The way I look at is you can only do your best to guide them as they make their way along their own journey, you can't set their destination and designate the stops along the way. Life would be so much easier if you could! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
walshie 2,804 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 Being stressed, busy or tired but a good caring parent has to be better than an alkie/abusive/negligent parent any day. I think deep down most people would be better grandparents than parents because A: They've mellowed a lot and B: Have already had a "practice run" with their own kids first. Ken, I bet if anyone asked your kids if they could change anything about their childhood, none of them would change a thing! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Waz 4,210 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 Going through it at the minute, having to go to court etc due to seperation. Ive spent the last years being the best dad to my elder son, & to his baby brother as I can, having to proove it has made me physically sick. God bless the good dads & that comes from an atheist.. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MoChara 1,600 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 I had my first child as most of my school mates became grandparents! To be honest i'm really happy about that, for me it's the right time in my life, i have no regrets, only the knowlage and expierence to try to do the very best by my daughter. Life's good, i'm relishing everyday as a parent. On the downside, maybe i'll never get to see my Grandchildren but thats not something i worry about, my job is to ensure my daughter becomes a happy, healthy, well rounded individual and lives the life she wants and if that goes to plan I know my Mrs is gonna be a very proud Grandmother. i for one think your just right, no idea what age you are but coming from my view as a girl in her 20's I look around at girls I went to school with and most of them have at least one child, on one hand I wonder if I'm the odd one not wanting children at young age then on the other hand I'd rather be completely grounded, wiser and financially stable and everything in between to have a child, then I know I've done it when ready. We've had the discussion of himself being 10yrs older that it may have to happen sooner rather than later. But no I'd rather take the chance and be 100% ready, he's already got two older children so he's bound to see grand kids from them do him bloody rightly I'll take my time! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
undisputed 1,664 Posted April 25, 2015 Report Share Posted April 25, 2015 Parenthood is just to prepare you for being Grandparents lol. Socks I'm sure your kids appreciate all you done for them and it sounds like you and your Mrs have done a good job. That's all you can hope for as a parent that your kids learn and listen and go on to be good parents themselves. One of the good things about being a grandparent is that you get to hand them back at the end of the day.lol 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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