I got my old mum a guinea pig a few years back, keep her company after her f***ing budgie or dog or whatever popped its cloggs........anyway, we go round for a cup of tea one day and there is the Guinea pig in a box on the side, not moving !
So I think, f***ing hell thats a well trained guinea pig......then I have a closer look and shout “Mum, what’s up with this guinea pig....it’s brown bread !”
She gets all offended and says “No, no, it’s just sleeping!”
So I say “What, with its eyes wide open.....what’s it doing? Yoga?”
Then I pick it up......stiff as a f***ing poker ! lol