Mums

[WILF 44,335]

I reckon some people are cruel and some just don’t / didn’t have the knowledge to be better than they were/are ........long as you learn from it with your own family that’s the main job 

[Greyman 25,295]

6 minutes ago, W. Katchum said:

Start forgiven am forgetting lads, my ole ma who raised me an 2 brothers an 2 sisters after me ole man died when I was 6 year ole had just been given 18 month to live, made me rethink my whole life this past week or so, really thinking bout some drastic changes all round

I,ve nothing to forgive mate I hold them no malice, it’s about breaking the cycle for me, it’s to easy to be a c**t and blame it on your upbringing but very hard to be better than your  piers and use there examples as things not to be repeated, but that’s what I am trying to be, it’s like keeping a hidden beast in a box,

[jetro 5,349]

18 minutes ago, W. Katchum said:

Start forgiven am forgetting lads, my ole ma who raised me an 2 brothers an 2 sisters after me ole man died when I was 6 year ole had just been given 18 month to live, made me rethink my whole life this past week or so, really thinking bout some drastic changes all round

Sorry to hear that W.K.

Make the most of what times left.

Atb j 

 

 

[Dinosaurs 2,008]

21 minutes ago, W. Katchum said:

Start forgiven am forgetting lads, my ole ma who raised me an 2 brothers an 2 sisters after me ole man died when I was 6 year ole had just been given 18 month to live, made me rethink my whole life this past week or so, really thinking bout some drastic changes all round

Sorry to hear that bud make the most of what times left & hopefully they get things right for her & you get extra time. Atb

[duggy 142]

I do find it sad to read some of ur posts on here. I personally was took into care when i was 18 months old. Still new my parents growing up but never really bothered with them as they didnt with me but i must admit when both were at there end i went to make some sort of peace and pleased i did. Now I was lucky enough to be given a home with a couple who brought me up as there own and for me earned the title as mam and dad. Theres nothing i wouldnt of done for them. Unfortunally they are now gone but ill be forever grateful and cherish every memory with them. 

Lifes to short and you never no whats around the corner.

Atb duggy

[bird 9,594]

i came from upbringing  where you was smacked, and it was always me mom  who hit you , either with boiler stick, that piece of wood they use for turning clothes in a hot tub , my old man was norm at work, and she didnt like to pressure him , when he came home from work. there  3 boys and 2 girls , i was the oldest  boy, the girls were older than me .Looking back now i am old bloke me self 67, and got one son , and 2 grand kids  . m y mom always put her kids before her self, we always had food on table, and clothes  to where, never much money with kids , but there was lot worse of than us. i never got on with my dad, he never liked my boozing, and messing about with women, i go out Friday night, and not go back home till Monday evening , but  my dad was right really, as got older and cut the booze right back, my attitude   changed . i always loved my mom, and she always had soft spot for me  all her life . i remember the last time i ever spoke to her , was in the garden  one sat afternoon , just me and her nobody else in the house, she said she always loved me, and said i was doing good job with my son , she smiled  then waled back into the house  to have a quick cuppa . the week after she died of   clot on Brain   , i tell you what even as old bloke i would love to chat to her, and my old man, enjoy them while you can deff  

[dogmandont 9,369]

2 hours ago, Dinosaurs said:

My dad 95 my mum 93 Always been there for all us kids &their  grandkids. All their grandkids visit them regularly & way i see it is they did well by me growing up so nows my turn/chance to look after them tho not so easy to help my dad with anything as hes still very independent bless him. Atb

I’m in the same situation as yourself with both parents being in their twilight years and not in the best of health, can be a hard watch seeing your parents turn into fragile little people but they done their best for us and now it’s time for us to do the same for them. 

[jetro 5,349]

My father died when he was 42, I was 18. I wasn't upset  and still not. No great loss to me to be honest. 

My wife and My self was with my mother, holding a hand each talking to her as she took her last breath and passed. It was sad, very upsetting for my wife, but I'm glad we were with her in the end. She finally got peace.

Atb j

 

[bird 9,594]

5 minutes ago, dogmandont said:

I’m in the same situation as yourself with both parents being in their twilight years and not in the best of health, can be a hard watch seeing your parents turn into fragile little people but they done their best for us and now it’s time for us to do the same for them. 

[Waz 4,212]

I lucked out regarding parents & being parented.

My old dear seems to be trying to right some wrongs & she has been half decent to my own kids since meeting them recently & they like her. So maybe its not too late.

[shaaark 10,140]

6 hours ago, Greyman said:

Sadly family are just, friends you have no say in, my mum is in a home not a 100 yards from my house and I drive past it twice a day, my old man drives past my front door to visit here twice a day yet our paths seldom cross, I have made the effort with my own kids to make sure they don’t feel the same, they are all here now having breakfast, kids, kids partners and grandson, but it’s not a given you only get out what you put in, most of my childhood memory’s are made up of beatings and locked doors, so why the f**k would you stay friends with that

3 hours ago, FLATTOP said:

I have seen my Mother once in 30 years at my Grandmothers funeral and my old man walked out when I was 4 it’s a long story not to be discussed on a public forum but Greyman I get exactly where your coming from.

If anything it’s made me stronger and more independent and focused. 

 

[gnasher16 29,664]

Not all families are close you dont choose your parents and i never happened to particularly like mine and they didnt me........nothing to whinge about and you always hope to break the cycle with your own kids.....i think theres nothing worse than forced relationships i have a pal who go,s round to see his parents every week they have a cuppa and watch telly for an hour then say see you next week....they cant stand each other,whats the point !

[Meece 1,957]

Life is strange.  My Father had a bad war experience out in Burma after a difficult childhood.  He was never nasty to me but he wasn't like a real at home dad because he worked away from home on marine stuff out in Germany on the Rhine.  I only got to see him once in a blue moon. Due to his war experiences and working away,   his marriage with mum suffered and to be honest they should have divorced but it wasn't the done thing years ago and they just got on with their own lives.  When he died and was put down the hole I felt nothing.  I didn't hate him or anything but it was just like being at the funeral of a random person. It was sort of over and back to whatever. I can remember ĺooking down the hole and thinking, " that's a long way down there. He won't be coming back up out of there".  My  childhood hasn't affected my relationships with my brother, Sisters,  my children and grand kids. All of our girls have a door key and occasionally if we're out we come home and there is a smiley face on the white board or a note ,  your minus two chocy biscuits we call each other regularly.  I never think of my dad at all which is sad because both of us lost out.

[gnipper 5,968]

My parents did a brilliant job with us and considering how much of a little twat I was they should have been awarded a medal. Me and my dad never seen eye to eye when I was a kid but as you get older and realise you've turned into him you can see why he was the way he was bollocking us etc. I really wish we had done more together like going for a pint and stuff but we were into different things and you always put stuff off don't you.

 My mum had lung cancer diagnosed and thankfully removed in April last year and then my dad died in June  from a pulmonary embolism, what a shit year last year was. I'm looking out for my mum a lot more now but it's hard with work and the kids. I'll keep trying though as she deserves it.