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mel b

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Everything posted by mel b

  1. It's not a porch , it's a orangery , and the donkey loves the ginger, it makes his eyes sparkle .
  2. The ginger is purely medicinal
  3. Feck me mack , the last thing that you ever want to do is take a walk through ditchmans mind .
  4. Ditchman will be gutted .
  5. That'll do nicely thankyou very much .
  6. You must be joking . I can't work the remote , I can't even figure out how to turn the TV on and off . When the kids were younger , if they really wanted to piss me off , they'd put a shite radio station on the TV, then go out . They knew that I could never figure out how to get the TV back on .
  7. Yep , it's my worst nightmare . Funny thing is , I can spend hours in a gun shop .
  8. I love spending time with my mrs . Just chilling out , or working together. I'm lucky , because she hates shopping as much as I do . My mrs smiles when she sees me .......leaving for work every day .
  9. I wouldn't have owned up to shopping , unless it's a gun shop , or fishing tackle shop. Fair play to you sticking to one meal a day mack . I could stick to one meal a day , just as long as a day only lasted four hours
  10. I see you're having to rough it as usual mack . You don't half get through some tidy looking grub mate .
  11. Politics is a really dirty shitty business. Most of the people I know are rogues of one description or another , but none of them are as dirty as politicians.
  12. I find it really sad . A young lad going away with his mates for a holiday adventure, and not returning home . It will have happened plenty of times in the past , and it'll happen plenty of times in the future. It's every parents nightmare. RIP fella.
  13. mel b

    Obesity.

    He was just having a rest between courses juke , and you tried to drag him home . No wonder he was so upset
  14. mel b

    Obesity.

    Weight is a funny thing . My late wife was 4' 11" , 7 stone , and could eat more potatoes than a pig , yet she didn't put on any weight at all . Within a couple of weeks of having the kids , her weight just went right back to 7 stone. Me on the other hand . I'll walk past a packet of biscuits in the asda, and put half a stone on. I'm only 5' 7" on a good day , and I'm touching 17 stone at the moment. The lightest I've been in my adult life is 15 stone , and at 15 stone my ribs are sticking out , my face is gaunt , and I look like social services should be taking care of me. I work wit
  15. I answered the question you spanner .
  16. My most sincere apologies oh learned one . It was quite clearly my fault that you didn't understand my reply. My meaning was that trying to reason with you , would be both legal , and morally correct, but , would be a complete and utter waste of my time. I promise to try much harder next time .
  17. It might not stop them doing it , but it would certainly stop them from doing it twice .
  18. . f**k me drunk , I almost tried to reason with you then. That would be the legal , and the morally correct thing to do , but f**k me it wouldn't half be a waste of time
  19. It's up to , public opinion , politicians, law makers , judges , and jurors , to decide if its legal. And yourself if its morally correct. I couldn't just walk down the road and murder a stranger , as it would be illegal, and morally reprehensible , but , if we still had capital punishment in this country , I could hang child rapists all day long , and wouldn't lose a minutes sleep over it.
  20. Plenty of times , just as long as you can justify it legally and morally. Theirs a difference between a killer and a murderer.
  21. The round clipped his ear . The mad old fecker is one lucky man.
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