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mackem

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Everything posted by mackem

  1. mackem
    I have visited people in a CAT A prison in this country,and visited friends locked up in two different countries abroad,f**k,they have it easy here,one mate in brazil was in a dorm type room with other guys
  2. mackem
    I fished on the Tweed once,long time ago when I was a kid,which beat is the old chap going to fish If he is as high-falutin as you say probably best not to mention tandoori nymphs old chap,some people just arent adaptable Grassington,bit far north for me,but I will be passing thataway in september when I cast a fly on a beat on the Wear,my old favourite As for getting picked up by the fuzz,I always shave,force of habit
  3. mackem

    Extreme sports!!

    mackem replied to LDR's topic in General Talk

    I used to do extreme shagging,had a latina girlfriend who stabbed me with a fork,I was always attracted to psychotic women
  4. mackem
    He has got a few previous cautions,only minor in the grand scheme of things Going fishing anytime soon Chess? Make sure to stock up on the old tandoorie powder,dust your nymphs between casts
  5. mackem
    It wont fit in the shed mate,chest freezers,waders,and a 100 yard seine-net in there I am just trying to work out why theres a line that sinks and one that floats,most odd,I will have a fiddle around with it next week when I have free time,I am sure it wont beat me Its ok FR,they might have done me but I normally come up smelling of roses
  6. mackem
    Get yourself a bubble float,starlight,spinning rod,fixed spool,8lb bs line,and maggots soaked in vanilla,though I did witness a massive amount of fish feeding on nothing more than green-giant sweetcorn last night
  7. mackem
    One thing I aint ever needed is a geography lesson chess He is out on police bail,sis is well pissed off,how can a 15 year old attack three adults?And what are the adults doing carrying a metal bar And this is in a NICE part of surrey,he goes to school in Wetbridge FFS
  8. mackem
    Oh yeah,good guess on the mesh Chess,not quite right though,and its not polypropylene,its 4.5 float-line I am just wondering what to do with my cork-butt Rex,where am I going to stick it?
  9. mackem
    Doesnt look like any canopy I would like to see billow open above me Chess,but if you like i will pack it for you No mate,I am the grin and bear it type,typical brit stoicism,besides I dont want to cause a fuss,I saw a net of this type on TV once I am sure if I remember how its supposed to look I can hang this one in an approximation of the TV image I just hope the saltwater fly rods ordered this morning arent ballsed-up This sort of thing could give people the wrong idea about sport fishing
  10. mackem
    Someone once said I was lucky in life,I always say luck is skill and opportunity colliding
  11. mackem
    My 15 year old nephew was arrested last week Chess,for attacking three grown men,he spent the night in hospital after being hit with a metal-bar,then was arrested after his release,I know all about our boys in Blue,those fine upstanding public"Servants" MAluku?Funny you should say that,heres pics,the stilt village is home to the badjao sea-gypsies,I once spent three months living with them in a village out as sea,I learnt a lot Unheard of fishing techniques?Its best I never mention some of them Chess,lets just say it pays to be flexible and vary your methods to suit the waters
  12. mackem
    Yeah,sorry steve,I just checked last weeks issue,I will give it to the bairn to deliver in the morning,its actually "Whores in Havana"
  13. mackem
    You lying g*t When you threw yourself face down in the bushes beside me you said you were looking for keys as well I think we should have fished for an hour instead of 20 minutes,funny thing is I have just been to Tescos,apparently theres been a rush on and they sold out of Tandoori powder
  14. mackem
    I am always deadly serious when chatting about fishing Rex,no embellishment whatsoever,thats the truth about old bill whizzing past I wondered why he didnt stop and chew the fat,but as joe said,two guys popping out of the bushes,masked up and shouldering big black bags couldnt possibly arouse suspicion Dont worry about the Wear,september is my month,I always found it the best,besides,theres one or two southern rivers I need to check out first,dont forget to let us know how you get on when you go skating on the rink
  15. mackem
    Any idea what sort of cam or housing they use to get that footage?Or are they tanked fish?I would love to get underwater footage of salmon at a jump I know
  16. mackem
    I forgot to share the good news with you Chess,I just got my prospectus through from Sparsholt,Fishery management
  17. mackem
    Well Chess,I aint got a clue about this mate,I mean,you place an order with a reputable fishing-tackle supplier and you expect to get your order right?I opened the parcel,wheres the f***ing blank?Reel-seat?Cork-butt?And what the f**k is this Well,you can almost sense my disappointment at the mix-up in the orders Oh well,I am always one to make the best of a bad situation,I suppose I can still salvage something from this cock-up I just have to remind Joe that he shouldnt set this net across an estuary,or worse still across a river slightly upstream when anadromous fish are running It would
  18. mackem
    Lycanthrophy Stay on the roads,stay off the moors,and always home-load your pistol with smelted silver church crucifixes
  19. mackem
    I will tell you what DID spice last night up chess,apart from the curry We were just stepping out of some bushes onto the road when we saw car headlights coming around the bend 60-70 yards away,I didnt think anything of it,but at that split-second I realised I had dropped my house-keys back in the shrubs so I jumped back in and crouched down looking for them and JOE followed because he also dropped his keys,yeah,coincidental but true Who should come tearing around the corner?Plod himself I wanted to jump out and flag him down,because six years ago I saw a local ten year old dropping toff
  20. mackem
    I like wearing pink and eating bologna sandwiches
  21. mackem
    Lager swilling chess?ME?Teetotal mate,saw a guy get stabbed once in a bar,never touched a drop of alcohol since and that was way back in history As for Mr P Passing on the secret of the tandoori nymph,well,just as his ancestors imparted the knowledge to old Issac I guess he sees a kindred spirit in myself,either that or my son delivers his news papers and I know he gets a brown package containing "Sluts in Slovenia" every month Wouldnt want Mrs P to find that out would he a small price to pay say I
  22. mackem
    Fu**ing hell,I used to hate Hartlepool,Seaton Carew is better but only just,we used to go camping at trimdon dene,happy days Joe brought his "Rod" round last night,there seems to have been a mix-up in communication or orders I will put up a pic later,not QUITE what I was expecting But our little fishing jaunt last night lightened the evening,I am suffering the effects of it now though
  23. mackem
    Theres nothing quite like teaching your son how to fish Mines been enthralled ever since he saw the youtube clip showing afghani soldiers fishing with an RPG,wants to know can we get one I like the way youve blended in the music with the pics Fish,it works well
  24. mackem
    Joe came around last night F**K,my wife doesnt like me knocking around with him,says he is trouble and will lead me off the straight-and-narrow But it was only to drop something off so no problems.Nowt in the fridge to eat,or leastways nothing I fancied,its filled with macrobiotic yoghurts and organic celery so we decided to go for a take-away,Kashmiri Nights is just around the corner,and their Alu Ghobi "afterburners" are shit hot food So we are chatting away to Mr Patel waiting for our order,and he is blabbing about the old country and how he misses home(bradford) when talk turns to fish
  25. mackem
    I am not as active as I used to be wyllie,due to my advanced years(I just found my second grey pubic hair )but I just hobble along the waters edge casting at fish rises
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