Pet hates.

[big sid 1,119]

some fussy people on here when your as poor and as ugly as me any hole's a goal

[gnasher16 29,662]

1 hour ago, THE STIFFMEISTER said:

Oh don’t even start 

obviously the car keys live on the side of the couch and the bank card on the mirror shelf in the en-suite bathroom , where else would they live ? 

these mysteries also align with “have we got any cat food ? “ or making the f***ing bed or fake eyelashes on every f***ing surface in the house , or mascara on the carpet , or standing on a pair of eyebrow tweezers or not putting a bag in the bin and finding it full of empty st tropez spray tins .

Does my canister in , feel like max from wolf of Wall Street for the first hour I get back in from work . 

Womens hygiene is just a mystery to me at times,my ol woman is immaculate in every way.....yet the other day i caught her using my electric toothbrush...." what do you think you're doing thats my one " i says......" my one's packed up i just thought id use yours "........" yeah but sharing a toothbrush is f****n mingin whats wrong with you " i says......." well i have a lot worse of your bodily fluids than that in my mouth what difference does it make " she says.......must admit i didnt really have an answer  

[gnasher16 29,662]

1 hour ago, lurcherman 887 said:

To heavy handed mate, you need to calm down and take your time, it’s only a defenceless bag. 

Nah to begin with i was gentle,patient and respectful ......but at some point you just gotta show these things who's boss......they wont try that shit with me again 

[WILF 44,322]

29 minutes ago, gnasher16 said:

Womens hygiene is just a mystery to me at times,my ol woman is immaculate in every way.....yet the other day i caught her using my electric toothbrush...." what do you think you're doing thats my one " i says......" my one's packed up i just thought id use yours "........" yeah but sharing a toothbrush is f****n mingin whats wrong with you " i says......." well i have a lot worse of your bodily fluids than that in my mouth what difference does it make " she says.......must admit i didnt really have an answer  

Bang !!!……cop for that ! Lol 

[Leo Sayer 1,704]

2 hours ago, mackem said:

 

Used to love Phoenix Nights, proper northern humour lol 

[twobob 1,458]

On 11/03/2024 at 06:52, Arry said:

The One's I call 40's drive 40mph in a 70 limit and 40 in a 30 limit.

Cheers Arry

Had one of them this morning 40 in a60 50 ina 40 whats wrong with em arry be facked if i know

[Qbgrey 3,986]

1 hour ago, twobob said:

Had one of them this morning 40 in a60 50 ina 40 whats wrong with em arry be facked if i know

If you can work them out you will be richer than bill gates and more intelligent than Stephen hawkings laptop

[eastcoast 3,729]

On 09/03/2024 at 22:25, THE STIFFMEISTER said:

Taylor swift 

rated as a feminist icon , absolute slosh pot , been shoved more times than a Chinese fire door

sick to death of her average fizzock staring out from every nfl game highlights, over celebrating her fellas every touch . Boring middle of the road bint who if it wasnt for her pushy parents would be sat in the tills in walmart in middle of butt f**k nowhere . 
 

bang average 

Her angst ridden songs of failed puppy love ain't exactly up there with Nina Simone or Billy Holiday but I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating biscuits. Would make her lick up all the crumbs though.