Mad malicious women.

[DogMagic2 21]

8 hours ago, DIDO.1 said:

You have long weird fingers

Aint my hand, just an image off google  Butthey could wrap around twice

 

[mackem 23,825]

6 hours ago, big sid said:

your a penny away from billionaire status and if you cut the heating costs down a bit you'd be a multi billionaire like wilf.

I actually found 6 pence today on a pavement in Central London,the streets are indeed paved with gold.

[Qbgrey 3,987]

Women are a fuking money pit tho not to mention kids, Jesus I shudder at the £££££ they cost me, I’d be driving a Bentley pick up by now

[Jonjon79 13,340]

Nutters do exist.  I was shacked up with a loony bird for a while in my mid 20s. Being woken up by a punch in the face and loads of screaming is a very weird sensation I got dressed and walked out laughing my head off that night. That really pissed her off - the big vase that she threw, missed me and smashed her cars back window . I kept laughing and carried on walking until I was gone . I could still hear her shouting and swearing from a few streets away

[THE STIFFMEISTER 14,563]

12 hours ago, TOMO said:

No amount of botox is going to make you any prettier socks 

I’m telling him 

[gnasher16 29,664]

One of the nuttiest birds i ever encountered years ago was a high flying sales rep for a fashion magazine,really attractive sort she was.....this was before womens boxing was a thing but over the years ive often thought back and this lunatic im positive could of been a world champion !.....i was knocking about with her for a few months back in the late 90's,the writing was on the wall early on when during sex she would ask me to hit her ......having never laid my hands on a woman in that way in my life plus being a big strong aggressive chap in them days i was none too comfortable about doing it so would give her silly little slaps on the bum and stuff....." harder than that for f**k sake " she'd say....well as time went on it became more and more to the point where she was calling me names and shouting at me during the act saying i hit like a girl and things ......this one day i lost my rag and just gave her an almighty clump in the ribs and thought id killed her.....she couldnt get her breath for a minute and i held back thinking id done some damage but she just looked back at me and said " thats more like it " !!........eventually we split up and the night i told her it was over she stood in her flat punching herself in the face not letting me get out the front door,saying she was going to tell plod id beat her up if i didnt stay in a relationship with her.....her face was literally caked in claret as she started bouncing her head off the walls.......i ended up jumping off her first floor balcony at the back and drove home to my gaff sharpish half expecting a knock on the door from plod......she never did though and i just gave her a wide berth for a few weeks and it all blew over,but stone me what a complete fruitcake she was 

Edited January 25 by gnasher16

[jukel123 6,570]

1 hour ago, gnasher16 said:

One of the nuttiest birds i ever encountered years ago was a high flying sales rep for a fashion magazine,really attractive sort she was.....this was before womens boxing was a thing but over the years ive often thought back and this lunatic im positive could of been a world champion !.....i was knocking about with her for a few months back in the late 90's,the writing was on the wall early on when during sex she would ask me to hit her ......having never laid my hands on a woman in that way in my life plus being a big strong aggressive chap in them days i was none too comfortable about doing it so would give her silly little slaps on the bum and stuff....." harder than that for f**k sake " she'd say....well as time went on it became more and more to the point where she was calling me names and shouting at me during the act saying i hit like a girl and things ......this one day i lost my rag and just gave her an almighty clump in the ribs and thought id killed her.....she couldnt get her breath for a minute and i held back thinking id done some damage but she just looked back at me and said " thats more like it " !!........eventually we split up and the night i told her it was over she stood in her flat punching herself in the face not letting me get out the front door,saying she was going to tell plod id beat her up if i didnt stay in a relationship with her.....her face was literally caked in claret as she started bouncing her head off the walls.......i ended up jumping off her first floor balcony at the back and drove home to my gaff sharpish half expecting a knock on the door from plod......she never did though and i just gave her a wide berth for a few weeks and it all blew over,but stone me what a complete fruitcake she was 

You were very lucky mate. Could have gone a different way.

[gnasher16 29,664]

39 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

You were very lucky mate. Could have gone a different way.

We was probably both lucky in a way......i did hear years later that she did similar things with a couple of other people and ended up getting nutted off to a funny farm.....shame really as she was a successful,very together bird outside of relationships.

[DIDO.1 20,891]

2 hours ago, gnasher16 said:

One of the nuttiest birds i ever encountered years ago was a high flying sales rep for a fashion magazine,really attractive sort she was.....this was before womens boxing was a thing but over the years ive often thought back and this lunatic im positive could of been a world champion !.....i was knocking about with her for a few months back in the late 90's,the writing was on the wall early on when during sex she would ask me to hit her ......having never laid my hands on a woman in that way in my life plus being a big strong aggressive chap in them days i was none too comfortable about doing it so would give her silly little slaps on the bum and stuff....." harder than that for f**k sake " she'd say....well as time went on it became more and more to the point where she was calling me names and shouting at me during the act saying i hit like a girl and things ......this one day i lost my rag and just gave her an almighty clump in the ribs and thought id killed her.....she couldnt get her breath for a minute and i held back thinking id done some damage but she just looked back at me and said " thats more like it " !!........eventually we split up and the night i told her it was over she stood in her flat punching herself in the face not letting me get out the front door,saying she was going to tell plod id beat her up if i didnt stay in a relationship with her.....her face was literally caked in claret as she started bouncing her head off the walls.......i ended up jumping off her first floor balcony at the back and drove home to my gaff sharpish half expecting a knock on the door from plod......she never did though and i just gave her a wide berth for a few weeks and it all blew over,but stone me what a complete fruitcake she was 

I had a semi on reading that. 

[WILF 44,334]

3 hours ago, gnasher16 said:

One of the nuttiest birds i ever encountered years ago was a high flying sales rep for a fashion magazine,really attractive sort she was.....this was before womens boxing was a thing but over the years ive often thought back and this lunatic im positive could of been a world champion !.....i was knocking about with her for a few months back in the late 90's,the writing was on the wall early on when during sex she would ask me to hit her ......having never laid my hands on a woman in that way in my life plus being a big strong aggressive chap in them days i was none too comfortable about doing it so would give her silly little slaps on the bum and stuff....." harder than that for f**k sake " she'd say....well as time went on it became more and more to the point where she was calling me names and shouting at me during the act saying i hit like a girl and things ......this one day i lost my rag and just gave her an almighty clump in the ribs and thought id killed her.....she couldnt get her breath for a minute and i held back thinking id done some damage but she just looked back at me and said " thats more like it " !!........eventually we split up and the night i told her it was over she stood in her flat punching herself in the face not letting me get out the front door,saying she was going to tell plod id beat her up if i didnt stay in a relationship with her.....her face was literally caked in claret as she started bouncing her head off the walls.......i ended up jumping off her first floor balcony at the back and drove home to my gaff sharpish half expecting a knock on the door from plod......she never did though and i just gave her a wide berth for a few weeks and it all blew over,but stone me what a complete fruitcake she was 

f***ing hell !……I think that could very well take the cake as “nuttiest ever bird” story !…..lol 

Edited to add:

Im still chuckling having a vision of you giving her a poke up the ribs and doing your James Bond bit off the balcony ! Lol 

Edited January 25 by WILF

[gnasher16 29,664]

37 minutes ago, WILF said:

f***ing hell !……I think that could very well take the cake as “nuttiest ever bird” story !…..lol 

Edited to add:

Im still chuckling having a vision of you giving her a poke up the ribs and doing your James Bond bit off the balcony ! Lol 

Its a story ive told quite a few times over the years its usually met with either a giggle and a " awww poor woman " or a frown and a " you horrible b*****d "...........must admit its never been met with a " i got a semi listening to that " so id book Dido as a particularly disturbed chap .....you probably would of got on quite well with her mate 

[TOMO 24,880]

Have you ever had an ex chuck petrol on you and stand there holding a lighter screaming at you ....

Got to say my arse cheeks were puckered a tad....head to toe dripping in petrol 

[WILF 44,334]

1 minute ago, TOMO said:

Have you ever had an ex chuck petrol on you and stand there holding a lighter screaming at you ....

Got to say my arse cheeks were puckered a tad....head to toe dripping in petrol 

Dripping in 4 star like a pakis sister at a nightclub ! Lol 

[DIDO.1 20,891]

31 minutes ago, gnasher16 said:

Its a story ive told quite a few times over the years its usually met with either a giggle and a " awww poor woman " or a frown and a " you horrible b*****d "...........must admit its never been met with a " i got a semi listening to that " so id book Dido as a particularly disturbed chap .....you probably would of got on quite well with her mate 

You got her number still?

[mackem 23,825]

1 minute ago, TOMO said:

Have you ever had an ex chuck petrol on you and stand there holding a lighter screaming at you ....

Got to say my arse cheeks were puckered a tad....head to toe dripping in petrol 

I know a guy who was cheating on his wife with a younger woman,his wife was a bit hot tempered,took his pistol to the house where he was with his younger model,fired a shot in the air screaming and shouting,he hid till her brothers came and removed her.Left her,lived with his new woman and died of cancer.