In laws

[bell 3,532]

5 hours ago, Leo Sayer said:

Not quite in laws, but a funny story. Years ago I was with an old girlfriend and we moved inn and lived together for a couple of years. Now I met her parents and her mum was lovely but her dad was a right cnut from the outset. I just didn't take to him and he bullied his wife and daughter and spoke to them like peaces of sh1t. I'm quite outspoken so he soon got the jist that I wouldn't wear any of it. So he add a few quid and bought one of them massive motorhomes the real big ones. So I really didn't want to go away in it with them, but did to please my girlfriend as you do. We went to Wales and just stopped in laybuys here and there. The weather was crap just constant rain. So I felt trapped with this bell end. So one day it's peeing it down with rain and we are all playing cards at the table, which was situated next to the bathroom. I felt I needed to go for a poo, now I'd been holing it in for a while as felt a bit awkward in a confined van. But it got to the point I REALLY need to go !!! So I made my excuses and popped into the toilet. I did the biggest Richard I've ever sh1t my life, it was like my forearm. So I flushed the bog and nothing happened it just stayed there over this tiny little hole ! I thought what am I gonna do , so I thought should I lob it out the window , but against better judgement I declined that idea. So plan 2 cut it up in to quarters to get down the hole, genius ! Just need something to cut it with , genius 2 use the bell ends toothbrush !!! So using the handle part I proceeded to chop it up and push down, job done and feeling quite pleased with myself,  washed his brush and put back. Later that night he said anybody need the bathroom as I'm off to brush my teeth ?? I was pissin myself , never liked him since the day I met him and the day me and her parted lol. Karma eh 

Lob it out of the window 

[Aled 385]

19 hours ago, shaaark said:

I remember  a little bit of Welsh from school, is that 'mother/mothers'? Lol

Nearly shaaark, Mamgu is Welsh for Grandmother. 

[leegreen 2,105]

On 01/01/2024 at 05:39, Leo Sayer said:

Not quite in laws, but a funny story. Years ago I was with an old girlfriend and we moved inn and lived together for a couple of years. Now I met her parents and her mum was lovely but her dad was a right cnut from the outset. I just didn't take to him and he bullied his wife and daughter and spoke to them like peaces of sh1t. I'm quite outspoken so he soon got the jist that I wouldn't wear any of it. So he add a few quid and bought one of them massive motorhomes the real big ones. So I really didn't want to go away in it with them, but did to please my girlfriend as you do. We went to Wales and just stopped in laybuys here and there. The weather was crap just constant rain. So I felt trapped with this bell end. So one day it's peeing it down with rain and we are all playing cards at the table, which was situated next to the bathroom. I felt I needed to go for a poo, now I'd been holing it in for a while as felt a bit awkward in a confined van. But it got to the point I REALLY need to go !!! So I made my excuses and popped into the toilet. I did the biggest Richard I've ever sh1t my life, it was like my forearm. So I flushed the bog and nothing happened it just stayed there over this tiny little hole ! I thought what am I gonna do , so I thought should I lob it out the window , but against better judgement I declined that idea. So plan 2 cut it up in to quarters to get down the hole, genius ! Just need something to cut it with , genius 2 use the bell ends toothbrush !!! So using the handle part I proceeded to chop it up and push down, job done and feeling quite pleased with myself,  washed his brush and put back. Later that night he said anybody need the bathroom as I'm off to brush my teeth ?? I was pissin myself , never liked him since the day I met him and the day me and her parted lol. Karma eh 

Shame there wasn't camera phones, would've made a good tictok clip 

[poxon 5,565]

On 01/01/2024 at 05:39, Leo Sayer said:

Not quite in laws, but a funny story. Years ago I was with an old girlfriend and we moved inn and lived together for a couple of years. Now I met her parents and her mum was lovely but her dad was a right cnut from the outset. I just didn't take to him and he bullied his wife and daughter and spoke to them like peaces of sh1t. I'm quite outspoken so he soon got the jist that I wouldn't wear any of it. So he add a few quid and bought one of them massive motorhomes the real big ones. So I really didn't want to go away in it with them, but did to please my girlfriend as you do. We went to Wales and just stopped in laybuys here and there. The weather was crap just constant rain. So I felt trapped with this bell end. So one day it's peeing it down with rain and we are all playing cards at the table, which was situated next to the bathroom. I felt I needed to go for a poo, now I'd been holing it in for a while as felt a bit awkward in a confined van. But it got to the point I REALLY need to go !!! So I made my excuses and popped into the toilet. I did the biggest Richard I've ever sh1t my life, it was like my forearm. So I flushed the bog and nothing happened it just stayed there over this tiny little hole ! I thought what am I gonna do , so I thought should I lob it out the window , but against better judgement I declined that idea. So plan 2 cut it up in to quarters to get down the hole, genius ! Just need something to cut it with , genius 2 use the bell ends toothbrush !!! So using the handle part I proceeded to chop it up and push down, job done and feeling quite pleased with myself,  washed his brush and put back. Later that night he said anybody need the bathroom as I'm off to brush my teeth ?? I was pissin myself , never liked him since the day I met him and the day me and her parted lol. Karma eh 

Pure brilliance mate! Had me rolling reading that 

[green lurchers 16,385]

Wife’s side are on tag or having a lay down the rest are dysfunctional  which makes it only my side at Crimbo it suites me fine.