Blackmag 5,870 Posted February 13, 2021 Report Share Posted February 13, 2021 10 minutes ago, Ken's Deputy said: Groid; I'm happy as all fukk, mate. Ain't no kunt means shit to me. Owe no kunt shit. No kunt ever gonna turn round and take my shit away. No Contract! What I post bothers you in any way? Well; Ain't life a Bitch?! I'm not sure how to break this to you Ken but max said hes going to rid you of all your prize possessions whether your there or not and spend the proceeds on copper cocks 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ken's Deputy 4,456 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 I honestly have no real response to that! I guess I just don't 'get' the whole Max thing? This is me, see? Found he was clogging up entire threads with his - to me - meaningless arguments. Put him on Ignore. (Easy Life!) Lately? Checked a couple of his replies, to threads I was more curious about? Found he'd calmed down He's off my shit list now. But, case in point! Isn't dear Max more likely to go incandescent off the back of some perceived slight to his wife?! Boom! My point, entirely! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ted Newgent 4,896 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 Caught my missus closing all the curtains on the north side of the house during summer. I asked her why was she doing this her answer “ I don’t want the sun blearing thru the windows” my reply “ if the fckn sun is north of the house we are fckd” 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Arry 18,615 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 Think my Mrs favourite saying is " I haven't seen it ". She has, can't remember she has, can't remember were she has put it. Drives me insane. I was putting up a light in the kitchen one day. Put my hand down for the screwdriver, gone. What have you done with the screwdriver? "haven't touched it" buggered if I could find it. So got another out of my toolbox, two hours later I found it in the cutlery draw. Cheers Arry 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
wilbur foxhound 480 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 5 hours ago, Arry said: Think my Mrs favourite saying is " I haven't seen it ". She has, can't remember she has, can't remember were she has put it. Drives me insane. I was putting up a light in the kitchen one day. Put my hand down for the screwdriver, gone. What have you done with the screwdriver? "haven't touched it" buggered if I could find it. So got another out of my toolbox, two hours later I found it in the cutlery draw. Cheers Arry Just showed this to mine and she said that I do that,this is coming from a woman who had put the polish in the fridge 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Arry 18,615 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 58 minutes ago, wilbur foxhound said: Just showed this to mine and she said that I do that,this is coming from a woman who had put the polish in the fridge I could not find the TV remote one day look high and low down the back of the sofas under sofas. It was in the bloody bathroom. Cheers Arry 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gazjon5 708 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 20 hours ago, Daniel cain said: For Good luck... My old man always said if you spill any salt, you throw a pinch over your left shoulder to blind the devil 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
steve66 3,086 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 Could right a bloody book on the daft stuff she comes out with , one of the best was : ohhh they want killing them suicide bombers and we,ve not had a bbq since the last one 1 7 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dogmandont 9,364 Posted February 14, 2021 Report Share Posted February 14, 2021 I do. 1 1 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
chartpolski 20,418 Posted February 15, 2021 Report Share Posted February 15, 2021 I could write a long list, but my missus has a look on here now and again, so, for the sake of matrimonial harmony, and anything for a quiet life, I'll hold my tongue ! ! Cheers. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
wilbur foxhound 480 Posted February 15, 2021 Report Share Posted February 15, 2021 8 hours ago, chartpolski said: I could write a long list, but my missus has a look on here now and again, so, for the sake of matrimonial harmony, and anything for a quiet life, I'll hold my tongue ! ! Cheers. Coward 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
chartpolski 20,418 Posted February 15, 2021 Report Share Posted February 15, 2021 14 minutes ago, wilbur foxhound said: Coward I've been happily married for 45 years.........I'd like to make it to 46 ! ! Cheers. 1 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
steve66 3,086 Posted February 15, 2021 Report Share Posted February 15, 2021 1 hour ago, chartpolski said: I've been happily married for 45 years.........I'd like to make it to 46 ! ! Cheers. Happy wife happy life 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mushroom 12,392 Posted February 17, 2021 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2021 (edited) Oh ffs she's come home with another one Fuucking nobhead has just bought a table for her gaff. Arrives to the woman's house to pick it up, with her mate (nope I'm not helping with my back lol) Took the pair of them half an hour to get it out of the door (spacial awareness isn't one of her strong points).... then the daft twats realised they had a table, two chairs and had to walk half a klick and there's only the two of them to carry 3 things between them, so they sat down for a minute to think about it (Don't! I know ). They eventually get to her gaff and the fuucking thing wont fit in her lift (her flat is on the fifth floor ) So this pair of Welsh girls have then decided to then take the legs off it with a knife (it has bolts, not screws, yes I did ask what's wrong with a screwdriver initially lol). The pair of them then had to carry this table up what can only be described as 5 flights of stairs that are tighter than a ducks arse. Before they measured her door! They eventually managed to get it in through her door and into the gaff...... This was the story directly out of her mouth when she just walked through the door and she's surprised I'm creasing on the floor Edited February 17, 2021 by mushroom 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mushroom 12,392 Posted February 24, 2021 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2021 New one, just happened.... Watching (Legend (the film about the Krays) 45mins into the film, she turns around and says "is Tom Hardy playing both parts in the film" 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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