sandymere 8,261 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 I’m also another old father 52 yrs with a 3 yr old, I’ve certainly gained patience but still have a love of life and remain relatively fit so we get to spend a fair bit of time together. I might not get to see much of the grandchildren past their early years but have more time now than I had when younger to spend with her. She loves the dogs, one of her favourite things is to go Gruffulo hunting when we take the dog for a walk through the wood. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nans pat 2,575 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 i was passing the shop earlier on there a wee kid says here mister can you get me a pack of fegs in there.told him to fook off and he says there for me dad,why doesent he get off his lazy arse and get them himself zez i,he said hes not eighteen yet they wont serve him either, Quote Link to post Share on other sites
oxo 396 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 Definitely a better Granda than Dad here. My wife brought our 2 girls up as I was always at work(3 jobs at the time) and did a great job but they are really "her" girls, both grown up now. The youngest fell pregnant while still at school to my dismay but was dead set on being a good Mam, her and the father split up when Alfie was a few months old as expected. He is 2 and a half now and my pride and joy, my daughter got her own flat and they moved out for a very short time but are back here now. I am a lot mellower than I was and love spending time with him, walking the dog, messing in the garden anything. got into night and he was waiting " Yeddy Ganda? Lets play", quick kick about in the garden and a shared bath, happy days Quote Link to post Share on other sites
brookie 1,193 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 my eldest is 33 and my youngest is 5 ,the difference is as you get older you appreciate things more .you have a lot more patience and of course time on your hands .as a young man we are all flat out grafting and of course taking every thing for granted .then one day you sit down and think to yourself. where the hell did that last twenty years go ? ive got grandchildren older than my youngest . so im a very lucky man in lots of ways .i get on like house on fire with my eldest son .yet im with my youngest son every day we spend together .eating ,hunting .grafting yet we argue like cat and dog over anything and everything till it comes to paying then hes my best mate Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ChrisJones 7,973 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 I couldn't imagine not having her now. I wasn't fussed about having kids at all. But I can't remember my life before her. I was glad I was in my thirties and so was the misses though. Might sound selfish but when your nineteen r twenty with two kids you'll regret it imho, your twenties are for going out and getting leathered and get amongst a few tarts. Better to get it out of your system before regretting it all at thirty five and being that tragic guy who doesn't want to go home I am quite happy now for the wife to get all dolled up and go out with her pals, I couldn't care less now I have her. I was married at 22 and had three lads by 27. It was hard for me seeing my mates, with money, going out on the lash all the time. I initially regretted it, and felt cheated out of something. Being there for the first steps, first words, first day at school, etc, changed all that big time. Hit me like a train. I didn't want to go back to my teens and twenties any more and my mates gave me shit, for 'changing' and drifted away. Pushing 40 my mates are still single and doing the same things. I'm still married and my kids are growing like weeds. My mates are living in the past. I find it pretty sad actually. Constantly going on about the good old days. If you're living in the past you're doing it wrong, IMHO. Kids don't come with any manual. You just make shit up as you go along. I moved over here to give them a crack at being kids instead of growing up in shitty inner city areas. It cost me my career, a ton of money. It took me from my family and friends. I don't have a single regret. I was young enough to do it. To pick up and start again. Now, I have three well adjusted kids. They're doing great at school, and all are playing instruments. I could probably push for a job that pays better but requires me to spend a lot more time on the clock. I could work more and earn more. But I don't. My kids just want to spend time with me on my days off! They phone me up when I'm at work, and ask how I'm getting on! I hear all about the shit kids do, from them. We go out together and they just want to hang around with dad. I think I'm doing something right. 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,501 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 Well my old man wasn't the best of Dad's.. he loved me and my brother for sure but followed the wrong path for a bit too long maybe? Meaning we had a bit of a different upbringing and I had to grow up quick to look after my brother and at times my mum.. who was great. He had a very bad upbringing and I think at times he struggled with responsibility and the full commitment, we've got a great relationship now though. He is without doubt a great Grandad,the kids idolise him, plus he lets them get away with murder, the amount of times I say to him " don't let them do that dad, pull them in line and stop it" " I can't do that Kev, I don't want to upset them".. never in a million year would we have got away with it. I try to do things differently with mine, I realise time is the one thing the kids want more than anything, if my dad f****d up when we were kids, he'd buy us something, we were away from him for 6 years, when we did see him he would buy us stuff as if to make it up.. stuff is no substitute for time IMO. I work too much I know that, but I put the kids to bed, take them out doing things as much as possible and try to remain a constant as much as possible, there's no rule book to it though, and I think every parent regrets things all the time, you can only try your best. As long as my kids have decent manners, are polite, happy (most of the time) and healthy (all of the time) I'm happy enough... As far as being a Grandad, my eldest is 16 and I hope it'll be a long while yet before I'm a Grandad, she's got a lot of life infront of her and I hope she lives it. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WILF 44,744 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 I just moved to a little farm in a rural area and 90% of the decision to do it was for my kids.......it's a very rural area and it's lovely. To see my little lad head off out into the fields and just be a lad is great, they can actually just be kids. The school where 2 of them go only has 60 kids and 3 teachers !! Lots of people have said to me "why the hell did you move here there's not much going on" bit they don't understand that in England we were not living, just existing and working to pay the f***ing politicians and I just couldn't bring myself to condem my kids to the same. They couldn't even play out in the street, just marking time until it was their turn to get on the hampsters wheel. I am not a rich man, I couldn't give them everything I wanted for them but I can give them this.......I can give them freedom and that's good enough for me. Some top replies above, there's a lot of good dudes out there. 10 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,501 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 I just moved to a little farm in a rural area and 90% of the decision to do it was for my kids.......it's a very rural area and it's lovely. To see my little lad head off out into the fields and just be a lad is great, they can actually just be kids. The school where 2 of them go only has 60 kids and 3 teachers !! Lots of people have said to me "why the hell did you move here there's not much going on" bit they don't understand that in England we were not living, just existing and working to pay the f***ing politicians and I just couldn't bring myself to condem my kids to the same. They couldn't even play out in the street, just marking time until it was their turn to get on the hampsters wheel. I am not a rich man, I couldn't give them everything I wanted for them but I can give them this.......I can give them freedom and that's good enough for me. Some top replies above, there's a lot of good dudes out there. Plays on my mind a lot mate that I can't just let them go out, I'm not inner city by a long way but it really isn't as it used to be, The next year or so will see us heading into a more rural place, hopefully with a bit of land where the kids can go adventure without me keeping an eye. If you walk along the river, only mins from my house the poles are drinking in groups of 3 or 4 every couple of hundred yards along, the park across the way is the same, most benches poles drinking. Not really doing any harm I suppose, but f**k letting my 9 year old lad out walking about when I've no idea who is in my community any more 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slippery_Weasel 460 Posted April 27, 2015 Report Share Posted April 27, 2015 Some great posts on here. I love being a dad, could do with being a stay at home one as well but the chance would be a fine thing 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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