What's cooking?

[ditchman 3,424]

32 minutes ago, mel b said:

That's because you just ooze homosexuality mate , and you just wouldn't be safe . Me on the other hand , would just terrify your average homosexual male , and could instantly convert your average homosexual female.

Strangely enough. I've spent many evenings in the company of hundreds of homosexuals , and apparently,  they find me quite charming. 

I remember one evening particularly well , when a homosexual gentleman was trying to chat me up near the gentlemens toilet.  I thanked him , and explained that I was straight . He said  " that's such a shame you'd make a great bear " , then turning to several other homosexual gentlemen , said " wouldn't he make a great bear ? ".  They all agreed , so I thanked them for there kind words , and went back to my position on the door.

Anyway . Chuffed with my many compliments,  I explained to the other door lads , what had just happened.  They almost pissed there pants , and explained to me what a bear was .

On another occasion ( at a different establishment) , a homosexual gentleman attempted to touch me , somewhat inappropriately.   I won't go into too much detail , but I reckon he'll be f***ing sure to ask politely before he ever tries to touch anyone again.

im speechless................you prick-teasing slut......you need to stop taking fresh ginger matey...its making your anus chatter .....thats what the bum boys can hear.....its like a bloody mating call

[mitre 288]

Well I don't think our youngest brother would be so polite about it I be honest he could do with a love life with either gender pain in the Arse

[mel b 3,691]

12 hours ago, ditchman said:

im speechless................you prick-teasing slut......you need to stop taking fresh ginger matey...its making your anus chatter .....thats what the bum boys can hear.....its like a bloody mating call

I can't help it if I have a large gay following.   My boyish good looks and schoolboy charm can be a curse at times .

[ditchman 3,424]

16 minutes ago, mel b said:

I can't help it if I have a large gay following.   My boyish good looks and schoolboy charm can be a curse at times .

i thought it was more to do with tramps taking a dump on your porch and you sticking joss-sticks up a donkeys bottom

the people on here really need to be aware of your picadillos...

[mel b 3,691]

Yeah yeah yeah , don't try to pretend that you've never had the donkey experience

[jok 3,464]

How the heck has this degenerated from taking some faggots down to the pub. Sick weirdos. Jok

[ditchman 3,424]

17 minutes ago, mel b said:

Yeah yeah yeah , don't try to pretend that you've never had the donkey experience

quite honestly Mel ....i have never ever stuck a lighted joss stick into a donkeys bottom....i will leave that to the professionals........

jeesus there are some sic fecks on this website

[mel b 3,691]

27 minutes ago, ditchman said:

quite honestly Mel ....i have never ever stuck a lighted joss stick into a donkeys bottom....i will leave that to the professionals........

jeesus there are some sic fecks on this website

I can't reply mate. I think jok is getting a bit fruity , and he doesn't know why .

Don't worry jok. It's just a bit of piss taking . Nobody got bummed.

[mitre 288]

LGBTQ oh well better than having starmer discussions

[mel b 3,691]

4 minutes ago, mitre said:

LGBTQ oh well better than having starmer discussions

Wise words

[ditchman 3,424]

Meanwhile back at the ranch................

ive gone vedgy

 

[The one 8,587]

1 hour ago, jok said:

How the heck has this degenerated from taking some faggots down to the pub. Sick weirdos. Jok

Because Ditchmans Curious 

[Arry 24,898]

Wifey did a deep filled Quiche again. All I did was the wedges.

Cheers Arry

[shaaark 11,431]

2 hours ago, mel b said:

Wise words

He's a veritable SAGE!

[ditchman 3,424]

1 hour ago, The one said:

Because Ditchmans Curious 

do i get my own flag ?