undisputed 1,664 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 Ok got a pair of young jills about 3 months ago. Now I thought i was being quite fly about it (a cunning plan you might say) and talk the mrs into it. Now I remember her talking about having ferrets herself when she was younger ( and 3 stone lighter) so I put it in such away that she would be heavily involved in the socialisation and getting them used to being handled and how cute they are ( so far so good). Anyways she goes and picks them up from the guy behold I'm at work ( stage 1 in the plan) now I've spoken to him on the phone and agreed the price (£5 each) which is pretty reasonable I think. She on the other hand is so taken by them she gives him £30 (warning bells) ok so it's her money and I let it slide. Over the weeks props start appearing (ferret tents, ferret rattles, balls and 15ft of tumble dryer tubing) again I let it slide as they're becoming very tame and easy to handle. So as they're getting bigger I suggest building a ferret court outside and some sleeping quarters. "oh it's a bit cold for that" is the reply ( those bloody warning bells again) so thinking I've won that particular argument I let it slide again. Come home from work the next day and there's a bloody big plastic job (ferret cage) in the kitchen the only way I can describe it is a f*****g giant hamster cage, 3 levels with ladders and f*****g ferret hammocks.... I f*****g kid you not, ferret hampers!. Right time for some man input, get ready that night and get the dog in the truck lamp and with grim resolve those bloody ferrets are having rabbit flesh tonight (up until then it had been ferret kibble, cooked chicken and malt f*****g paste.....yip malt paste! ( no longer listening to those warning bells) . Anyway come back with a couple of bunnys and the next day I've got them out on the patio with the rabbit carcass, ferret number one has a sniff ( promising) then quickly loses interest, second ferret actually latches on to the rabbit and attempts to drag it off (yes) but again loses interest when the mrs appears at the door. Thinking on me feet I whip the head of the bunny and place it in the ferret palace for later....next day rabbit head still intact. She pips up they're still a bit young.....Sooo! I let it slide again.....as the weeks progress Eco and Sandy ( yip they've got names now) continue to entertain an harras the the cats and dog and shit in the litter tray ( don't ask). Right it's time to take charge now the ferrets are well tame and enjoy being handled so time for the man (me) to take charge. I find out she's bought harnesses for them with the intention of walking them ( shit time for drastic action, which in man speak means lying and exaggerating) you cant walk them till they've been jabbed (true) there's a rare form of ferret flu going round I tell her. She looks at me incredulously your lying Shenh says no I'm not look on that bloody ferret forum you go on says I. Ok says her ( phew) when I can I get them jabbed? You need to wait a year says I. Luckily the mrs is staying with her pal tonight and I 'm in charge ( heh heh!) Back out with the lamp again another bunny for the jills......slip into the cage that night fingers crossed there will be a half mutilated corpse in the morning."............wellllll it didn't Quite go to plan.....I'm in bed the next morning and get woke by an almighty scream and doors banging.....I run downstairs and there's the mrs best friend with the 4yr old god daughter absolutely distraught cause there's a dead and still unmolested rabbit in the cage.....shit! Well I'm currently in the bad books and the bloody ferrets have still to eat raw flesh... Planning on a wee ferreting trip at the weekend to see how the girls react....I'm packing the malt paste just in case but if I get a lie up ( very unlikely) I won't be able to go home till they come out it could be an interesting weekend....anyway have to g it's time for Eco and sandys bath......well if you can't beat them join them I say.....by the way can anyone lend me a working ferret? 11 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ideation 8,217 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Duncan 802 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 Pure class! Your plan did backfire and shoot you in a bollock eh? Never mind - just starve the blighters for a day or two and sneak em some bunny Good luck, but I have a horrible feeling you'll have to give up on SWMBO's pets and get a fresh batch of your own lil' killers. D. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gnasher16 31,602 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 And the moral of the story.....................lay the law down from the off it saves time later on Funny little story anyway. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dymented 2,220 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 lol :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
undisputed 1,664 Posted December 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 And the moral of the story.....................lay the law down from the off it saves time later on Funny little story anyway. Oh that's not the end of it mate the one called sandy has developed a taste for g&t I've been gelded:( Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 that made me laugh.ffs dont lose them lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
johnny boy68 11,726 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 Your missus sounds exactley like mine. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
undisputed 1,664 Posted December 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 that made me laugh.ffs dont lose them lol Seriously if I lose even one I can kiss my ass goodbye.....i've got a jcb on standby Quote Link to post Share on other sites
littlefish 598 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 'ferret props started to appear' :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
B.P.R 2,798 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 You mentioned this to me. If I was you, just leave the rabbit in and don't feed them. My old jill was from a pet home and she only ate kibble and cat meat. I left the raw meat in with no kibble or anything and she soon got into it after a day or so. My four went through that rabbit in 2 days, bones, eyes, and everything. Only the skin left and they was using that as bedding. Pm sent mate. Pm sent mate. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
undisputed 1,664 Posted December 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 You mentioned this to me. If I was you, just leave the rabbit in and don't feed them. My old jill was from a pet home and she only ate kibble and cat meat. I left the raw meat in with no kibble or anything and she soon got into it after a day or so. My four went through that rabbit in 2 days, bones, eyes, and everything. Only the skin left and they was using that as bedding. Pm sent mate. Pm sent mate. I would mate but she's never away long enough for me to starve them lol....and at the risk of traumatising a 3yr old again I'll need to come up with a better plan Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Moll. 1,793 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 I'm packing the malt paste just in case but if I get a lie up Superb :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
undisputed 1,664 Posted December 5, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 I've got pictures but I'm to embarrassed to put them up... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
B.P.R 2,798 Posted December 5, 2011 Report Share Posted December 5, 2011 Get the pics up! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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