Bullying.

[ChrisJones 7,973]

23 minutes ago, Billy b said:

If it was as simple as just telling someone to man up then every man with breath in he's body would have it in em to fight and talk up for them self, but that ain't the case, cos some just ain't wired up that way & that's why divs who think they are big killer men single em out 

I can't bare people who pick n choose there customers, I say if you won't pick on that man don't pick on that man, but this kid here being tormented shouldn't be put in a position to be made to feel like he's got to fight if he ain't that way inclined that's just mongrels capers when people do that 

There is some proper sops in the world today & I hate all the PC sh*t and some people are just shameful but this is a kid trying to crack on with he's bit of learning, it is a harsh ol world and a lot worse does go on but to me it's more embarrassing the boys bullying him get a kick out of such a easy target , shameful,

8

Great post!

I'm sure there are enough cases where one has retaliated and ended up on the wrong end of the law or even the wrong end of someone physically stronger and more capable. It's a nice gesture that if you simply stand up to it it'll go away but that's rarely the case.

I'll agree that the way people are raised plays a part but it's not simply about fighting skills and the ability to floor a larger attacker with some MMA training. It's about the stronger protecting the weaker across the board and that's a core attitude that you have to teach to a point. The minute you start throwing threats around is the moment you could potentially be the bad guy.

[bigmac 97kt 13,732]

4 hours ago, socks said:

The key to stopping bullies is the parents ... once the bully's  father knows what it's like to not know when somebody could knock their door and slap them around because of what their son is doing they soon make sure their sons stop ......

Thats exactly what i did i followed the lad home and slapped his dad then told him if it went on,,,, every time your lad hurts my lad im going to hurt you .

worked a treat

mind now my son is a ufc fighter and every one keeps away from him lol

EVEN ME

ATVBJIMMY

[ChrisJones 7,973]

18 minutes ago, socks said:

It would but not all fathers have the balls to front up to people .....

That's true but again not all fathers are capable of confronting physically stronger and more dangerous men. Or they get there and there isn't a father at all. Or after all that, it gets worse. Or you keep the code of silence and when the victim retaliates the school side with the bully because the only recorded act of violence is the act of retaliation. I'm sure the rules and regs are different in Britain but because of Columbine over here in the US if you 'pick up a chair and start swinging' you'll be expelled immediately and the victim is now the bully.

It would be really shit if you went to protect your kid and ended up with a custodial sentence. With bullying, everyone has to be involved in fixing it.

[scothunter 12,609]

So if youre kid is bullied you go and bully his dad who has not done anything to your kid. 

That makes no sense whatsoever. 

It also sends out the wrong message.

I agree you should confront the parent of the bully and he will probably listen and be horrified his kid is being a c**t.  

[bigmac 97kt 13,732]

8 minutes ago, bigmac 97kt said:

Thats exactly what i did i followed the lad home and slapped his dad then told him if it went on,,,, every time your lad hurts my lad im going to hurt you .

worked a treat

mind now my son is a ufc fighter and every one keeps away from him lol

EVEN ME

ATVBJIMMY

even what i did was not right may be it made me a bully but at first we went through the usual channels notified the school and all the meetings with the teachers and the head ,

but nothing was working

it still went on

so i was going to just have a word with the lads dad until i was told that the lads dad was standing egging his son on to belt my son one ,

and this in front of other parents ,

NOW MY SON IS NOT MY SON HE,S MY STEP SON BUT TO ME HE IS MINE AND ALL WAYS WILL BE

NO ONE AND I MEAN NO ONE HURTS MY KIDS OR ANY OTHER PART OF MY FAMILY FULL STOP

IF THEY DO ILL HURT THEM OR THERE DADS IN THIS CASE

atvbjimmy

[stumfelter 3,032]

Years ago my lad had a bully Nick some of his Pokemon cards (that's how long ago it was!) I asked my lad if he knew where the bully lived which he did so I flew round there and said to his dad "your son will bring the cards back and apologise or I"ll be back with more than words". Sure enough his son came round with the cards and apologised. 

Although if his dad had been a Bronson lookalike I'd have said  "good day sir Jehovah's witnesses are you interested" no "very good sir I'll be on my way"!

[WILF 44,300]

Anything like this for a parent should be a “take a deep breath” moment.

I think all of our initial reactions are to go vigilante about these things but I have learned nearly everything in life warrants counting to 10.

Like me, your upbringing and circumstances may have been very different to how you have raised your kids and the world you have allowed them to experience......so you really want to bring that into their life by falling back into your former life?

In my case it would almost always be a “No”

Theres almost always another way........and if there isn’t, well then we all know where we are at and what to do.

[socks 32,253]

13 minutes ago, scothunter said:

So if youre kid is bullied you go and bully his dad who has not done anything to your kid. 

That makes no sense whatsoever. 

It also sends out the wrong message.

I agree you should confront the parent of the bully and he will probably listen and be horrified his kid is being a c**t.  

That's all down to temperament though Scott some people can be diplomatic whilst others can't ... I must admit as time goes on I do find myself being a calmer person about situations but that only lasts so long especially when family is involved ......

[micky 3,325]

Many years ago i was at school with a lad who went on to become famous Racing Driver, his Dad had built him a rough track in one of his fields and every night a gang of us would have Bike races on it  or Time Trials  as Roger liked to call it, one night two lads turned up who were a bit older spoiled  our game and pushed us around , this went on for a while until no one turned up to race , Rogers Dad who was called, Dodge,  made inquiries then collared me and Roger and told us that we had to stand up for ourselves and gave us a bit of advice .    B y this time the lads had started to come by our school at night  and pick on us among others , one night me and Roger were waiting for them with our Bike Pumps and gave them a good pasting i even knocked one of the lads front teeth out, the next week we had to go to the Headmasters room  [ MrTwistleton] with my Mam and Roger with his parents a Copper the bullys parents and the school s Vicar and other people who told them what had been going on ,  we had to sit outside the study while this was going on and after what seemed hours we were called in , the Headmaster and the Copper came and said Well done lads  and shook our hands . Years later i saw Roger opening a place in Leicester and he said that when he wrote his life story he would put this tale in his book but sadly he died in a race in 1973 .

[WILF 44,300]

2 minutes ago, Rusty_terrier said:

I'm sure he won't be bullied anymore now his mum has out a video of him sniffling and crying in the internet for the whole world to see.  That's probably sealed his fate for the rest of his school days .

I hear you matey and I think, looking at a lot of posts, a few lads here have real experience of the darker side of things and how cruel life can be.

And I totally understand the “why is she making a f***ing video” reaction.

But if you stop for a moment and look at things with kinder eyes, not everyone has those type of life experiences.......they know nothing of the world where you go round and put someone in intensive care.

So, this may be her way of fighting back because whatever else it certainly is a powerful clip and one that choked me and I’m sure a few other lads here.

Its what she CAN do.......the kind heart says you can only work with the tools in your box.

[bigmac 97kt 13,732]

I new of two kids that took there lifes because of bullying

it took us weeks to get it out of my son

and only 5 mins to sort it once i flipped

im not saying it was the right way by all means but my son is still hear and breathing

I say good on her

but i think it will fall on deaf ears ,

I just hate bullys

atvbjimmy

 

[ChrisJones 7,973]

9 minutes ago, WILF said:

Its what she CAN do.......the kind heart says you can only work with the tools in your box.

 

Agreed mate but the old adage runs true. If the only tool you have is a hammer, then every problem becomes a nail.

[greg64 2,562]

49 minutes ago, scothunter said:

So if youre kid is bullied you go and bully his dad who has not done anything to your kid. 

That makes no sense whatsoever. 

It also sends out the wrong message.

I agree you should confront the parent of the bully and he will probably listen and be horrified his kid is being a c**t.  

worked for me scott I told the father what was happening and he said boys will be boys ,told him what would happen to him if it carried on .problem solved 

[socks 32,253]

They allow themselves to be bullied because that's  the way their made ... if everybody was up for a scrap every two minuets there would be fukcing carnge ... the world has always had and will always have victors and victims ... its natures natural balancing act ... you could take some people and train them to the highest level of fitness and fighting and they would still get beaten to shit in a fight because mentally and internally they just don't have it ......

[greg64 2,562]

that wasn't the case with my lad the other lad was at least 3 years older and twice his size