On Day 6 God Populated The North

[paulus 26]

Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Archangel Michael found him on the seventh day resting. He enquired of God, 'Where have you been?'

God pointed downwards through the clouds. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, 'What is it?'
...
'It's a planet,' replied God, 'and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance.'

'Balance?' inquired Michael, still confused.

God explained, pointing down to different parts of the Earth. 'For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot, and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people.'

God continued, pointing to the different countries.

This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.'

The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to another area of land and asked, 'What's that?'

'Ah,' said God. That's the North of England, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful people, seven Premiership football teams in the North West alone, and many impressive cities; it is the home of the world's finest artists, musicians, writers, thinkers, explorers and politicians. The people from the North of England are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as speakers of truth.'

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, 'What about balance God, you said there will be BALANCE!'

God replied very wisely, 'Wait till you see the bunch of tossers I'm putting down South

[WILF 51,859]

"But because they are so good looking and I like Londoners, I will put 5 premiership teams all in one city ! "

[paulus 26]

"But because they are so good looking and I like Londoners, I will put 5 premiership teams all in one city ! "

The dark lands :laugh:

[The one 8,612]

When you say north you mean Scotland surely

[patterdalejoel 669]

seven prem teams in north west?

[paulus 26]

seven prem teams in north west?

its god he can do and say what he wants :laugh:

[Huan72 687]

From the south coast of Hampshire...............................yet again God spits in my face

[Blackbriar 8,569]

Where does that leave us Midlanders, then ?

[WILF 51,859]

Where does that leave us Midlanders, then ?

Exactly where you are.......nowhere !! Lol lol lol

[paulus 26]

Where does that leave us Midlanders, then ?

somewhere between gods country and the darklands :laugh:

[nothernlite 18,268]

 

Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Archangel Michael found him on the seventh day resting. He enquired of God, 'Where have you been?'

 

God pointed downwards through the clouds. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, 'What is it?'

...

'It's a planet,' replied God, 'and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance.'

 

'Balance?' inquired Michael, still confused.

 

God explained, pointing down to different parts of the Earth. 'For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot, and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people.'

 

God continued, pointing to the different countries.

 

This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.'

 

The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to another area of land and asked, 'What's that?'

 

'Ah,' said God. That's the North of England, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful people, seven Premiership football teams in the North West alone, and many impressive cities; it is the home of the world's finest artists, musicians, writers, thinkers, explorers and politicians. The people from the North of England are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as speakers of truth.'

 

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, 'What about balance God, you said there will be BALANCE!'

 

God replied very wisely, 'Wait till you see the bunch of tossers I'm putting down South

:laugh:

Edited April 7, 2013 by nothernlite

[nothernlite 18,268]

lol

 

Its not far from the truth.

just missed out about there pockets being so deep in the north and south of England

[The Seeker 3,048]

Amen brother.........amen

[marshman 7,758]

What's the difference between Northeners and Southerners ?

Southerners live to the south of Birmingham and don't stink of urine .

[neems 2,406]

What's the difference between Northeners and Southerners ?

Southerners live to the south of Birmingham and don't stink of urine .

 

 

Calm down flower,it's not good for you getting all wound up.

 

Why not just grab your man-bag,stick some guy liner on and go to the local wine bar for a shandy to relax?