When I first moved to England I was managing on pig farms in North Notts. Had two lads on one farm Kev & Kyle (real names!) who didn't get on at all, fisty cuffs etc. Used to wean once a week, busiest day of week & this time I had to put K&K working together.
Got call off Kyle "Kevs run home shitting himself". Now I thought figure of speech, asked what's happened this time....?? "No gaffer, he's actually filled his pants in the tractor!!" Oh ffs!! Too many cans of monster!