Bloke reads in the local paper about a talking dog for sale rings up,goes round,knocks the door and a fella answers.
"Come about the talking dog"
yes mate he's in the front room go on through,where the dog is sat reading the paper.
"you come to buy me?"says the dog
"F*ck me!,you can talk"
"Yeah i can talk,fecking super dog me,started life as a guide dog but to boring for me so i was a police dog but again to boring for a super dog like me,so i joined the army and sniffed out bombs,terrorists,feck me i found obama for the FBI,worked with the SAS,SBS,CIA every one,sniffed out columbia's big