Was Over The Gun Shop Last Saturday

[Guest Ditch_Shitter]

Dave Movehill's shop is like a brick built and heavily armoured shed. But all ye really need to visualise is a f*cking shed. It's That cramped in there! Dave himself holds court from behind his big, cluttered table. Itself sand bagged with stacks upon stacks of crates of Clay's and god knows what. Gun Cabinets line the walls and micellanious other stuff cramps every other inch. Result is, there's barely elbow room for three men in there. There were three when Dean and I came to the door. So Dave, summing up the situation with practiced ease suggested we two go amuse ourselves in the Gun Room.

 

Back of the Shop is a sort of semi storage cum displayish room. Beyond that is the Gun Room. We were in there like kids into a sweet factory! We'd actually been bid, by Dave, to go look around. Oh; We fully intended to!

 

So, there we are in this fair sized chamber with Longs leaned up around three walls. Others were somewhat precariously stood beneath the shelfed ones. A couple were resting on their bipods. What to play with first???

 

Well, I have this unholy obsession with Black right now, so I only really had eyes for Black Synthetics. That counted out one, short wall because that was all Shotguns. And they were all O/U's. I wouldn't thank ye for an O/U. So I just grabbed me the nearest black rifle and started considering it's weight and feel. Shouldering it. Being disapointed. Examining it in an effort to find and read it's make and calibre detail. Then feeling grateful when Dean took a glance and was able to focus on the tiny etching and tell me what I held. I reciprocated by making both our scrota shrivel by reading out the price ticket! (2 or 3 Thousand Euro!!!) That one went Very Carefully back on the shelf!

 

In fact, to my horror, that's a scenario that seemed to be played out quite a bit that afternoon. I just now wonder; Could I have been reading Dave's hand written price labels wrong? Might I have been missing a decimal point? What's the ball park price on, say, a Tikka T3 .223 ? I seem to remember that was pretty typical of the two or three K price bracket. But 230 (eg) Euro seems too cheap. What ever. I was only there for a drool.

 

Mheanwhile, as I examined yet another woefully heavy black synthetic, I was dimly aware of appreciative noises coming from Dean's corner. He was reaching for something or other in the small section I'd noted held 'other' shotguns. Then, from behind me, I heard the distinctive sound of purest Aural Sex! KASHAK CSHAK!!! I turned slowly round, knees weakening, to see Dean O' standing there with a dream like grin of euphoria on his face. A 12 Bore Pump Action held in his hands. Our eyes momentarilly met and held in understanding. That f*cking sound Did It! W*nking Material!

 

Which is, to be honest with ye, more than I could say for the very vastest majority of the guns I handled that afters. And I, by and large, only really picked up the huge range of blacks amongst a quite mind boggling array of 'others' available there. I must have shouldred about everything from .22 LR to .243. Sadly, the only ones that I felt were as light and well balanced - for my frame and stature - turned out to be .22 LR's. Most of the rest had dreadfully heavy barrels and, whilst a big 'scope may have brought some balance back to them; What of the over all weight? Dave had no Remmington (Black Synthetic) .22 Mag's that day. And I found nothing else to match the handling of that one I found there before.

 

By the end of our little interlude in fantasy land though, I know I'd decided what I'd take home, had Dave sauntered in and graciously announced that I could take my pick of any three guns in that room:

 

One of them would have had to have been the Marlin .22 in 'Survival' mode. What a f*cking little beauty! Stainless steel barrel which attached to the fore end with a big, bright, s/steel hand nut. Unscrew that and off would come the barrel, halving the already short enough and handy length of this dinky little tool. The plastic furniture too made it so Light that aiming it, rock steady, with even just One Hand was a piece of piss!

 

Ok. Hands up. I haven't got the feintest clue what actual Use I may ever have for that little sweetie. But, by god; I'd Love to just own it!

 

Aother of my Fantasy Three would definately have been the (I believe it too may have been a Marlin?) big rifle which was probably a .222 or .223 in calibre. But which was most definately some top Gun Makers idea of showing us just what he could do to make our trousers tent! And This baby Did!

 

Dean and I couldn't get out eyes off this one! It Was Exquisette! Synthetic furnishing was of a darker mid blue. Veined with a sort of brass like 'cracking' effect. At first sight, I wasn't sure. But every second I looked at it, it drew me further.

 

Then the Barrel! OMFG! The barrel was stainless steel But it was fluted on four sides. Grooves cut along its length and stained in with black. I don't know why and I don't care. It Worked! God, that barrel Looked Good!

 

But the jewel in the crown of this visual treasure? The breech closure! Now, forgive me here guys. I've been a snapping breech gun guy all my life. Right from sprung air rifles, shotguns to my present Pig; 99% of my guns have been breakers. This was a Bolt Action. Thus I don't know the right terms for the parts there. But it was the sleeve that's visible when ye put one in and shut the bolt, ready to fire. It was a f*cking Masterpiece! Finely etched, all over, with a kind of diamond effect. It had the appearence of some sleek, shiney reptillian skin. Both Dean and I were completely entranced by it. In fact, I remember sighing to him that, could I own such a work, even though I had no use for such monsterous calibre (.223, I suspect it was?) I'd still treasure it as a thing of beauty. Only trouble is, I'd never lock it away in a cabinet ~ I'd want it here beside me. So I could just Look at it!

 

And my third pick? Well, it's funny really, how it's worked out like this. But I assure ye, this is just how my gut led me. It's only a fantasy trip, after all. But my third pick of the three I'd have carried out of Dave's Gun Room would, without a shadow of a doubt, have been the singular, lonely, old and worn Double Barreled, Side By Side 12 Bore Shotgun!

 

Yep. Barrels were more brown than blue. There was some 'Noticable' pitting inside the right hand barrel ~ F*ck it. Hadn't hurt the last owner and, number of shots I'd ever get to put through it, I couldn't see it ever hurting me either. Side Lock, Non Ejector. Probably been some old boys every day tool since he was a whipper snapper. Now it's sat, butt to the floor, in Dave's place. I'd Love to bring it home. Like some old, worn out and tired terrier, sat in a cage at the horse sales and destined for no where nicer that the Shannon on the way home, to a home he'll never see again. I just want to give that old timer a second lease of life and a loving home.

 

Oh well. That's all just a fantasy.

 

 

Maybe ..... one day ...

[camgun 0]

Sounds like a gold mine Ditch, I love gunshops like that jewels encrust the whole of the place. When I was 15 I went to a gunshop in suffolk it was like walking into a grotto, rifles shotguns pistols and plenty of other people young and old drooling just like me. I can picture myself with you, you certainly can tell a story.

[Ratman2 2]

That's a good write up Ditch

Gun shops, oh! dear hide my wallet, I become a drooling fool every time I go in one When I win the lottery I'm going to buy a gun shop with a shooting range, it will be closed to the public and I'll just enjoy myself all day long.

I have an old sbs and I love it, I've been told it was made early 60's but I've no idea, it's a double trigger non ejector. I use it for rough shooting and sporting clays, it gets looked after just as well as my Miroku, cleaned and oiled after every use. I often wonder who owned it before me and what action it saw.

[SNAP SHOT 194]

Well wrote ditch,

[Ratman2 2]

Bump for a damn good post, come on you miserable sods.

[foxdropper 17,092]

Whilst appreciating a nice gun ,its not quite wanking material to me I went round a couple of gun shops today in fact, looking for a new set of stalking sticks ,in realtree but none found .Bought my quota of ammo for a week or two though .

[theobenmike 0]

You are lucky to have a good gun shop "local" to you. There used to be a few about around here but one after the other they shut down

There are still plenty of places to buy cartridges, but none who have a showroom of guns to dream about

[COMPO 54]

DS

 

you have a way with words, last time i was in my local gunshop with the wife and my daughter i started looking at a pump action 20gauge, Wife said you dont have room in the cabinet for another gun......Colin who owns the shop replied, get another cabinet i then tried to persuade her that a 20gauge would be good to step my son upto when he has learnt with the .410........then i could teach my daughter to shoot with the .410 (shes only 2) she refused and asked Colin if he had any pink realtree patterned guns for teh little princess so perhaps in time i will have a pink realtree patterned 20gauge pump

[Malt 379]

Nice write up DS!

[clay man 0]

DS YOUR THE MAN PS ANY GOOD WITH YOUR LAPTOP

[Ratman2 2]

Whilst appreciating a nice gun ,its not quite wanking material to me I went round a couple of gun shops today in fact, looking for a new set of stalking sticks ,in realtree but none found .Bought my quota of ammo for a week or two though .

 

For me it's more drooling than errrmm