Guest Ditch_Shitter Posted October 5, 2007 Report Share Posted October 5, 2007 Anyone who's got a bit of land 'In the Country' will know that there are points and places where ye simply Don't want the splendour and beauty of nature. In my case, on the small patch of tarmac which cost me no small ammount of money, but which saves me and my Dogs stepping out of the cottage and up to our ankles in mud! But, nature has, and will have, her way. Barely twelve months since The Lads f*cked off and I was surveying my own little patch of reason, I'm finding tufts and spots of grass coming through. Plantain too. Leave that lot to its own devices and what'll happen? It'll grow. Flourish. Spread and, in next to no time, start holding soil particles untill I'm once again trudging through mud outside my own front door! Been there. Done that. F*ck the 'rural idyll'. Not if I can bloody well help it! So, ye know what I do? Most mornings, when I wake up and have my boots on, out I go. I stand there, whack out my dick and piss on the latest chosen one! I even make sure to go for the centre first, then, after a few days of that treatment, I aim for the outer edges Know what? It kills it, stone dead, within about a week and then I pick out a new clump to get The Treatment. Sound barmy? You try ripping that clump out! I have. Leaves ye with a fist sized crater in ye recently pristine bit of hard standing. Keep that up and, inside a few months, it'd look like The Somme! So, there it is. Just one more tiny little dot amidst the matrix of what it's like, and how to enjoy, living in the country Quote Link to post Share on other sites
harrycatcat 31 Posted October 5, 2007 Report Share Posted October 5, 2007 Bottle the piss and put it on ebay, make feckin fortune. Reduce reuse recycle. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ferret15 0 Posted October 5, 2007 Report Share Posted October 5, 2007 Anyone who's got a bit of land 'In the Country' will know that there are points and places where ye simply Don't want the splendour and beauty of nature. In my case, on the small patch of tarmac which cost me no small ammount of money, but which saves me and my Dogs stepping out of the cottage and up to our ankles in mud! But, nature has, and will have, her way. Barely twelve months since The Lads f*cked off and I was surveying my own little patch of reason, I'm finding tufts and spots of grass coming through. Plantain too. Leave that lot to its own devices and what'll happen? It'll grow. Flourish. Spread and, in next to no time, start holding soil particles untill I'm once again trudging through mud outside my own front door! Been there. Done that. F*ck the 'rural idyll'. Not if I can bloody well help it! So, ye know what I do? Most mornings, when I wake up and have my boots on, out I go. I stand there, whack out my dick and piss on the latest chosen one! I even make sure to go for the centre first, then, after a few days of that treatment, I aim for the outer edges Know what? It kills it, stone dead, within about a week and then I pick out a new clump to get The Treatment. Sound barmy? You try ripping that clump out! I have. Leaves ye with a fist sized crater in ye recently pristine bit of hard standing. Keep that up and, inside a few months, it'd look like The Somme! So, there it is. Just one more tiny little dot amidst the matrix of what it's like, and how to enjoy, living in the country ditch second time in one day im talking about body functions if you have the time try this every time you see your donkey piss at him soon he will learn to piss on command(some racing yards teach the horses to do this so they can samples for testing) both my horses do it. and you will have buckets full of the stuff to kill the weeds with Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Leon 0 Posted October 5, 2007 Report Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well I can't believe I'm f*****g reading this.... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
blackfell 16 Posted October 6, 2007 Report Share Posted October 6, 2007 hi ditch ive tried pissing on command on me block paving drive, to get rid off the weeds, but the nieghbours are upset , and im looking at an asbo now lol i shall wait till its dark next time and not on a sunday afternoon. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ditch_Shitter Posted October 6, 2007 Report Share Posted October 6, 2007 Blackfell; Isolation brings it's benefits to this practice, mate I do go out there at night though, with the torch. Trick, for you, would be to illuminate only ye target. It's not good that a neighbour should glance out and see a mans dick illuminated in a halo of torch light F15; Like as I might to put that training to the test on my own recalcitrant donkey; I can't whistle any more as I have no top teeth. Lips just sort of collapse when I try Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ferret15 0 Posted October 6, 2007 Report Share Posted October 6, 2007 Lips just sort of collapse when I try there is a punch line in their somewere Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Scuba1 Posted October 7, 2007 Report Share Posted October 7, 2007 If I think about, how moch Jack D. I would have to drink to turn piss into weed killer, I think I´ll just poor the stuff on the grass and set light to it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ditch_Shitter Posted October 7, 2007 Report Share Posted October 7, 2007 Been out there several times today, Mike. Dick in hand and thinking; " This beats the shit out of Paraquatte! " Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Scuba1 Posted October 7, 2007 Report Share Posted October 7, 2007 Been out there several times today, Mike. Dick in hand and thinking; " This beats the shit out of Paraquatte! " :feck: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gardener 0 Posted October 8, 2007 Report Share Posted October 8, 2007 A friend used to use it to keep the rabbits away from a certain patch of illegal plants (around, not on them!) and reckoned it worked a treat Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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