Misunderstanding

[walshie 2,804]

Bit long to put in my status.

 

Man walks into a bar......

 

"What would you like?" says the barman.

"What would I like?" says Bob. "A bigger house, more money and a more attractive wife."

"No," says the barman, patiently. "I meant what do you want?"
"To win the lottery, for my mother-in-law to die and for my child to be born healthy!"

"What's it to be?" says the barman, less patiently.
"A boy or a girl, I don't care."

"You misunderstand me," says the barman, impatiently, "I only asked what you want to drink."
"Oh," says Bob, "I see. Why didn't you say so? What have you got?"
"Nothing at all," says the barman. "I'm perfectly healthy."

[pip1968 2,490]

Bit long to put in my status.

 

Man walks into a bar......

 

"What would you like?" says the barman.

"What would I like?" says Bob. "A bigger house, more money and a more attractive wife."

"No," says the barman, patiently. "I meant what do you want?"

"To win the lottery, for my mother-in-law to die and for my child to be born healthy!"

"What's it to be?" says the barman, less patiently.

"A boy or a girl, I don't care."

"You misunderstand me," says the barman, impatiently, "I only asked what you want to drink."

"Oh," says Bob, "I see. Why didn't you say so? What have you got?"

"Nothing at all," says the barman. "I'm perfectly healthy."

thats your worst one to date walshie,,,,,,keep up he good work

[PIL 7]

Well that just wasted 60 seconds that I'll never get back :laugh:

[walshie 2,804]

Fast reader then eh?

[baw 4,360]

Does the punch line not come at the end of a joke or did I miss it

[stewie 3,387]

shite

[walshie 2,804]

FFS If it isn't slapstick you lot just don't understand.

[baw 4,360]

FFS If it isn't slapstick you lot just don't understand.

The thread header says it all

[stewie 3,387]

 

FFS If it isn't slapstick you lot just don't understand.

The thread header says it all

was typing the same thing mate..... seen someone else had posted and knew it would be you saying it.....

[baw 4,360]

Here one walshie you can get me back with

 

This is why there are no male agony aunts: Dear Jeff, last week I left for work as normal but having only gone a mile my car broke down so I walked home again & arriving unexpectedly I found my 16yr old babysitter handcuffed to the bed in her school uniform with my husband bent over her! I am devastated can you help ? Dear Sally... A common cause for this is dirt in your carburettor don't let your fuel drop 2 low in the tank hope this helps ...Jeff

[baw 4,360]

 

 

FFS If it isn't slapstick you lot just don't understand.

The thread header says it all

was typing the same thing mate..... seen someone else had posted and knew it would be you saying it.....

[stewie 3,387]

Here one walshie you can get me back with :DThis is why there are no male agony aunts: Dear Jeff, last week I left for work as normal but having only gone a mile my car broke down so I walked home again & arriving unexpectedly I found my 16yr old babysitter handcuffed to the bed in her school uniform with my husband bent over her! I am devastated can you help ? Dear Sally... A common cause for this is dirt in your carburettor don't let your fuel drop 2 low in the tank hope this helps ...Jeff

what do you call a mexican flying a plane??

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

a pilot......

[baw 4,360]

A bloke is watching the TV and suddenly yells "Don't enter that church, you daft c**t !!''

His wife asks him ''What are you watching ?'' Husband replies "Our wedding video"

[stewie 3,387]

a white guy, a paki and a chinky walk into a bar.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

what a great example of a united society

[baw 4,360]

I was sitting at the traffic lights yesterday, and a minibus full of muslims pulled up next to me.

Suddenly an 18 wheeler ploughed right into the minibus, wiping them all out.

"Wow, that could have been me" I thought.

So this morning I went out and got an HGV licence