The one 8,628 Posted February 3, 2013 Report Share Posted February 3, 2013 Subject: Fw: Fantastic News from Social Security LATEST NEWS نور اگر رفت سايه پيدا نيست نقش ديوار و چشم خيره ما نقش سايه دگر نمي دان نور اگر رفت سايه. ر رفت سايه پيدا نيست نقش ديوار و چشم خيره ما نقش سايه دگر نمي دان نور اگر رفت سايه پيدا نيست نقش ديوار و چشم خيره ما If I hear anything else, I'll let you know. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The one 8,628 Posted February 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 3, 2013 Subject: Fw: LOOKING BACK ON 2012 To commemorate the release of the topless photos of Kate Middleton, Royal Doulton will be releasing a Collector's Edition of two small jugs ----------------------- 7 wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40 ------------------------ A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt ................. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche... --------------------- Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Year’s Riots.... Your One Year Manufacturer’s Warranty Runs Out Soon ------------------- "IT'S A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, IT'S A BOY" and with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai brothel !!! ------------------------- 2 Indian junkies accidental snorted curry powder instead of cocaine. They’re both in hospital... one's in a korma… the other's got a dodgy tikka! ---------------------- The 100m final at the 2012 Olympics was just like any other Friday night in Brixton. You heard a gunshot followed by 8 black guys legging it! ---------------------------- In the first few days of the Olympics the Romanians took gold, silver, bronze, copper, lead and anything else they could get their bloody hands on ------------------------------- Sailing results are in, GB took gold, USA took silver and Somalia took a middle aged couple from Weymouth 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
pip1968 2,490 Posted February 3, 2013 Report Share Posted February 3, 2013 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lanesra 4,027 Posted February 3, 2013 Report Share Posted February 3, 2013 Was in the Indians last night for a takeaway , asked the for my favourite Chicken Tarka , the Indian Bloke said he wasn't sure off it , so I told him "It's like a Madras mate . . . only a Little Otter " ! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The one 8,628 Posted February 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2013 When you are over fifty who gives a cares? This girl looked at my beer belly last night and sarcastically said, "Is that Pedigree or Bass?" I said, "There's a tap underneath. Taste it and find out." *********** I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you 'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you." *********** I was telling a girl in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs. "Really" she said, "Go on then...try." After about thirty seconds of fondling her nipples she began to lose patience and said. "Come on, what day was I born"? I said, “Yesterday." *********** I got caught taking a pee in the local swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in. *********** I went to the pub last night and saw a fat chick dancing on a table. I said, "Nice legs." The girl giggled and said with a smile, "Do you really think so." I said "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now. " *********** 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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