joke

[Guest Scuba1]

A young man asked an elderly rich man how he made his money. 'Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last penny, so I invested that penny in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold that apple for ten pennies. 'The next morning I bought two apples, spent the day polishing them and sold them for 20 pennies. I continued this for a month, by which time I'd accumulated a fortune of £1.37. 'Then my wife's father died and left us £2 million.'

[beagle1812 0]

Soldiers in Afghanistan capture an Arab, they give him a dice and say ‘if you throw a one to five we’re going to kick the S**T out of you. The Arab smiles and says ‘what if I throw a six? Soldier smiles back and says ‘YOU GET ANOTHER THROW’!!!

Edited June 7, 2009 by beagle1812

[Wolly 4]

Soldiers in Afghanistan capture an Arab, they give him a dice and say ‘if you throw a one to five we’re going to kick the S**T out of you. The Arab smiles and says ‘what if I throw a six? Soldier smiles back and says ‘YOU GET ANOTHER THROW’!!!

Sick

[Guest STORM CHASER]

:11:

[The one 8,588]

[beagle1812 0]

When the nurse was bathing a female patient who had been in a coma for many months, she noticed a reaction when placing a sponge between her legs. When the doctor was notified, he called the husband and asked him to report to the hospital immediately. Upon his arrival the doctor explained that the nurse had seen a reaction when her private parts were stimulated. He suggested that the husband should have oral sex with her because it might lead to improvement in her condition. After about 15 minutes the husband came out of her room and announced that she was dead!

 

"How did that happen?" asked the doctor.

 

"I think she choked to death," said the husband.

[lilvixen 26]

 

An elderly British gentleman arrived in Paris by plane.

At the French customs desk, the man took a few minutes to locate his Passport in his carry-on bag.

"You have been to France before, Monsieur? " the customs officer asked, sarcastically.

The elderly gentleman admitted he had been to France previously. 'Then you should know enough to have your passport ready. "

 

The elderly gentleman said, 'The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it.'

'Impossible' said the customs officer. 'The British always have to show their passports on arrival in France !'

The Man gave the Frenchman a long hard look.

Then he quietly explained. 'Well, when I came ashore on the Beach on D-Day in 1944 I couldn't find any f***ing Frenchmen to show it to!!!

[boo-stig 0]

these jokes have made m y day

still laughing 10 min after

[Guest STORM CHASER]

When the nurse was bathing a female patient who had been in a coma for many months, she noticed a reaction when placing a sponge between her legs. When the doctor was notified, he called the husband and asked him to report to the hospital immediately. Upon his arrival the doctor explained that the nurse had seen a reaction when her private parts were stimulated. He suggested that the husband should have oral sex with her because it might lead to improvement in her condition. After about 15 minutes the husband came out of her room and announced that she was dead!

 

"How did that happen?" asked the doctor.

 

"I think she choked to death," said the husband.

 

:11: :11:

[Guest Pishy]

A coloured man goes to the doctors with a parrot on his head, The doctor asks "how can i help you today"

To which the parrot says" Can you get this blackhead out of my foot"......

[poacher3161 1,766]

Wats the best way to make an harvey wallbanger? move the furniture around in jordans house.atvb