Fao Mackem

[jukel123 9,754]

 A friend , a wind up merchant, just sent me this photo from God knows how many years back. You can see by the style of car it was way back.

He asked me if I remembered the day of the photo?

I said I didn't but I do. That day haunts me.

It was one of those crazy days when fish were all over the place. Everybody caught at least two fish. Many were over 20 lbs.

The big one in the photo was 24 lb.

I got a big fat zilch.

Everybody left the river and went home, but I soldiered on. Nowt.

The cat was booted into space when I got home.

On the other hand in 2012 I was so lucky it was surreal. I did not have a single blank. Guys took to calling me 'poxy'. I could arrive late. Stand next to somebody who blanked all day and hook a fish straight away. I did that a few times that year.

That's fishing.

 

 

 

 

Edited yesterday at 19:05 by jukel123

[Bendigo 1,252]

39 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

 A friend , a wind up merchant, just sent me this photo from God knows how many years back. You can see by the style of car it was way back.

He asked me if I remembered the day of the photo?

I said I didn't but I do. That day haunts me.

It was one of those crazy days when fish were all over the place. Everybody caught at least two fish. Many were over 20 lbs.

The big one in the photo was 24 lb.

I got a big fat zilch.

Everybody left the river and went home, but I soldiered on. Nowt.

The cat was booted into space when I got home.

On the other hand in 2012 I was so lucky it was surreal. I did not have a single blank. Guys took to calling me 'poxy'. I could arrive late. Stand next to somebody who blanked all day and hook a fish straight away. I did that a few times that year.

That's fishing.

 

 

 

 

30 years I've tried and still never had a salmon. 

Catch me a salmon next year jukel and I'll donate £200 to the left wing Charity of your choice

[jukel123 9,754]

Another mate, taken in the olden days. We caught these ses trout between us. Fished all night and then went to work. Oh to be young again.

I got all the big uns of course. When we split the money. It was a week's wages apiece.

 

Edited yesterday at 19:30 by jukel123

[jukel123 9,754]

4 minutes ago, Bendigo said:

30 years I've tried and still never had a salmon. 

Catch me a salmon next year jukel and I'll donate £200 to the left wing Charity of your choice

I have a particular favourite. Black dwarves, lesbian humpbacks and necrophiliac society.

A deeply deserving and much misunderstood minority. I'll make sure they each thank you in person by calling on you.

God bless.

[Halfhound 427]

Great time of year for sea trout now they run with the herrings in the estuaries they love this full moon oh the memories 

[jukel123 9,754]

3 minutes ago, Halfhound said:

Great time of year for sea trout now they run with the herrings in the estuaries they love this full moon oh the memories 

We get them in May/ June.

[Halfhound 427]

2 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

We get them in May/ June.

Yes we do too. One of the best eating fish you can get imo and also one of the best selling fish

[jukel123 9,754]

16 minutes ago, Bendigo said:

30 years I've tried and still never had a salmon. 

Catch me a salmon next year jukel and I'll donate £200 to the left wing Charity of your choice

Unfortunately, you've got to live near the river and pick your conditions. Then you can haunt the river until your luck turns.

I don't really believe in luck. It's just persistence and conditions.

When you are retired, you'll get one. You will be free to go at the right time.

[mackem 30,016]

20 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

Another mate, taken in the olden days. We caught these ses trout between us. Fished all night and then went to work. Oh to be young again.

I got all the big uns of course. When we split the money. It was a week's wages apiece.

 

Very Hugh Falcus.

Had quite a few 20+ pounders the last few weeks,nothing quite like it when they are hooked and jump clean out of the water.Some rivers are packed at the moment,pools are solid.

[jukel123 9,754]

Just now, mackem said:

Very Hugh Falcus.

Had quite a few 20+ pounders the last few weeks,nothing quite like it when they are hooked and jump clean out of the water.Some rivers are packed at the moment,pools are solid.

Geez. That's fantastic mate. Brilliant!

[mackem 30,016]

1 minute ago, jukel123 said:

Geez. That's fantastic mate. Brilliant!

Your not getting any younger Juk,tell your wife your going on a fishing trip,we can go to Alaska next year?

[jukel123 9,754]

1 hour ago, mackem said:

Your not getting any younger Juk,tell your wife your going on a fishing trip,we can go to Alaska next year?

Thanks for the offer Mac. But by the time I've emptied my colostomy bag and pee bag, and  received electric shock therapy to start my heart, the day would be over.

Tbh, I don't travel well and prefer my home patch. 

Anyway, are you sure you could handle my quoting Marx and Mao on my soapbox all day?. You would throw me in the river.

[mackem 30,016]

20 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

Thanks for the offer Mac. But by the time I've emptied my colostomy bag and pee bag, and  received electric shock therapy to start my heart, the day would be over.

Tbh, I don't travel well and prefer my home patch. 

Anyway, are you sure you could handle my quoting Marx and Mao on my soapbox all day?. You would throw me in the river.

I think you would be a most entertaining companion,your into "the fish" that's all that really matters.

[jukel123 9,754]

Believe this if you will . When our club go off to fish different rivers in Scotland my friend and I always share a hotel room.

He's a multimillionaire who owns thousands of acres. His former school is Eton.

He spent his early years in a state school, thinks most Etonites are areseholes and prefers the companionship of ordinary blokes.

We have the occasional tiff about politics but mostly we talk about fishing , family and sport.

We fell out once. He asked me if I wanted to clean his windows as he didn't trust anyone snooping around his house. I was short with him and asked him if he would clean my windows?

He got so upset his wife came round and asked me to give him a ring and sort it out. I'd forgotten all about it!

Once we were in Perth and I said what shall we do for grub before our dinner in the hotel?

I said how about a Subway sandwich or a chippy?

He said he didn't realise there was an underground system in Perth and asked why we would need to see a carpenter?

Before you ask, no,there is no Eton poofery between us......yet.

I live in hope.

The other guys call us Ralph and Ted from the Fast Show.

Edited 15 hours ago by jukel123

[jukel123 9,754]

https://youtu.be/CjM89wRMY9I?si=Ie4f8Bo5L9RCXgN-