LaraCroft 863 Posted January 28, 2013 Report Share Posted January 28, 2013 Just stitching me sides up The number of great jokes on here, you may want to start using glue - it's gonna save you a *lot* of time ! I bet you're quite handy with a needle and thread Lara, fancy coming to do it for me?? <noting down excellent chat up line for future use> You don't need chat up lines - you just need to know the 4 step rule... 4 answers to every situation, 1=bad and 4 = sex that night .... simples ! for example... step 1 ( bad) " what are you cooking me for dinner" step 2 (ok) "what shall I cook you for dinner " step 3 (good) " where shall I take you for dinner step 4 (ideal) " Here is some chocolate and a glass of wine" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
walshie 2,804 Posted January 28, 2013 Report Share Posted January 28, 2013 Just stitching me sides up The number of great jokes on here, you may want to start using glue - it's gonna save you a *lot* of time ! I bet you're quite handy with a needle and thread Lara, fancy coming to do it for me?? <noting down excellent chat up line for future use> You don't need chat up lines - you just need to know the 4 step rule... 4 answers to every situation, 1=bad and 4 = sex that night .... simples ! for example... step 1 ( bad) " what are you cooking me for dinner" step 2 (ok) "what shall I cook you for dinner " step 3 (good) " where shall I take you for dinner step 4 (ideal) " Here is some chocolate and a glass of wine" I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with 2,3 or 4. Nor do I want to be, but thanks. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
just jack 998 Posted January 28, 2013 Report Share Posted January 28, 2013 step 1 is true step 5 i'm lonely Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest thebigdog Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 step 5 here love do you want a wee sandwich, dont worry if it tastes a bit rohypnoly 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
baw 4,360 Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 I bumped into my ex girlfriend the other day. She said "Hi.. I've not seen you in years, how are you?"....I said "Not bad, I've got a lovely flat....." "A flat..." She rudely interrupted. " I've got a 4 bedroom house with a big garden and a double garage!!...but carry on loser!!" "As I was saying, I've got a lovely flat stomached sexy blonde who shares my lottery winnings to get back too so I've no time to talk , you fat ugly c**t!!!" This sounds more like a cry for help than a joke lab Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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