Scousers

[Buch 145]

Every one loves em (the jokes not scousers), ill start

 

SCOUSERS JOIN FERRARI

 

 

"The Ferrari F1 team fired their entire pit crew yesterday."

 

 

This announcement followed Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the British government's 'Work for your Dole' scheme and employ some Liverpudlian youngsters.

 

 

 

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Toxteth were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with millions of pounds worth of high tech equipment.

 

 

It was thought to be an excellent, bold move by the Ferrari management team as most races are won and lost in the pits, giving Ferrari an advantage over every other team.

 

 

However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for! At the crew's first practice session, not only was the scouse pit crew able to change all four wheels in under 6 seconds but, within 12 seconds, they had re-sprayed, re-badged and sold the car to the Mclaren team for 8 cases of Stella, a bag of weed and some photos of Lewis Hamilton's bird in the shower.

[christian71 3,187]

Every one loves em (the jokes not scousers), ill start

 

SCOUSERS JOIN FERRARI

 

 

"The Ferrari F1 team fired their entire pit crew yesterday."

 

 

This announcement followed Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the British government's 'Work for your Dole' scheme and employ some Liverpudlian youngsters.

 

 

 

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Toxteth were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with millions of pounds worth of high tech equipment.

 

 

It was thought to be an excellent, bold move by the Ferrari management team as most races are won and lost in the pits, giving Ferrari an advantage over every other team.

 

 

However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for! At the crew's first practice session, not only was the scouse pit crew able to change all four wheels in under 6 seconds but, within 12 seconds, they had re-sprayed, re-badged and sold the car to the Mclaren team for 8 cases of Stella, a bag of weed and some photos of Lewis Hamilton's bird in the shower.

Three men are sitting in the maternity ward of a hospital waiting for the imminent birth of their respective children.

One is an Mancunian, one a Scouser, and the other a West Indian.

They are all very nervous and pacing the floor -

as you do in these situations. All of a sudden the doctor bursts through the double doors saying "Gentlemen you won't believe this, but your wives have all had their babies within 5 minutes of each other."

The men are beside themselves with happiness and joy. The fathers are ecstatic and congratulate each other over

and over.

"However we do have one slight problem," the doctor said. "In all the confusion we may have mixed the babies up

getting them to the nursery and would be grateful if you could join us there to try and help identify them."

With that the Mancunian raced passed the doctor and bolted to the nursery. Once inside he picked up a dark

skinned infant with dreadlocks saying "there's no doubt about it, this boy is mine !"

The doctor looked bewildered and said "Well sir of all the babies, I would have thought that maybe this child could

be of West Indian descent."

"That's a maybe", said the Mancunian, "but one of the other two is a Scouser and I'm not taking the risk."

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