clipperbike 0 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 3 men are given a wish each by a genie.....an Irish farmer, Osama Bin Laden and an Englishman. The Irishman wished for all the land in Ireland to be forever fertile....in a flash his wish is granted. Bin Laden is amazed......."I want a wall built around all Muslim countries, so no western infidels can enter our precious lands".......in a flash, it was granted. The Englishman asked more about this wall.........the genie tells him it's 5000ft high, 500ft thick....nothing gets in, nothing gets out........ "Sounds great" says the Englishman........he sits down and lights a cigar............"fill it with water" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
littletimmy 71 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
byker83 29 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest bullterrier Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 met a 14 year old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and s*xy, so I suggested we meet up. She turned out to be an undercover detective. How cool is that at her age?! I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She said I had to stop w@nking. When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!" I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a d!ldo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that was an insect."To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a c%ck like that." I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train. He was chuffed to bits. When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids. Took her out with one punch. My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed. "It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me. A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter. Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about 5ex at that age." "Curious about s*x?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her appendix out!" I was walking in a cemetery this morning and saw a bloke hiding behind a gravestone. I said "morning." He replied, "No, just having a poo poo." Disabled toilets. Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in. I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed. How could anyone stoop so low? I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The one 8,564 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 :clapper: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest STORM CHASER Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 :11: :11: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest dances Posted June 27, 2009 Report Share Posted June 27, 2009 classics. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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