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Burns Night Speech - Jokes Required - HELP!


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Hi All,

 

Can you help? I have got to give a speech next Monday at a Burns Night. I am giving the "Englishman's view of the Scots" speech and have a few stories to tell but would welcome any suggestions that you might have. Jokes, funny stories, anything really that you think could raise a laugh from 150 pissed blokes!

 

Doesn't need to specifically related to Scots or Burns as I am sure I can modify any funny jokes to suit.

 

Many thanks in advance for your help.

 

 

Snelly.

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