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Help! Crows, CO2 emissions?


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Ok guys. I need info.

I want to conduct a study into CO2 emissions from the ever expanding crow, jackdaw and magpie population. ( Not sure of jays, besides they make good kebabs).

The global issue of rising greenhouse gasses has to be addressed and I need a grant of initially £2M to get studies started. 

Now the easy solution would be to shoot the lot I know but we still need a scientific base line. We need to know how much CO2 emissions can be reduced by removing the intake of oxygen by a crow or jackdaw or magpie.

This is important for the UK proposed targets.

How do I go about getting a grant from the useless studies office for such an undertaking?

  • Haha 3
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Our vegan friends are all ways banging on about the harmful greenhouse emissions from animal farming for meat and other production.

I want to do a counter study in determining the amount of harmful greenhouse gasses emmited from winged vermin especially as their breeding is spiraling up out of control.

  • Thanks 1
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49 minutes ago, Sausagedog said:

Well if your offering.

I just need a few more cartridges....strictly for scientific purposes I must add....

I can help you out with some big balls pal ?

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29 minutes ago, timmytree said:

Tell them you're a homeless, vegan black one legged lesbian muslim with mental health issues and a criminal record for dealing drugs. You'll get more cash than you know what to do with.

Cheers, I doo have mental issues as most here will attest too.

It's just the lesbian part, I might struggle there a little! 

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Move to the London boro of ammersmith n fulham ,wheel barrows of cash for all stupid  causes and daft ideas .Or Derby for that matter 1 year the crazy council gave a grant to the Lesbian Irish  single parent families association fffs who ,what how the 

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20 minutes ago, timmytree said:

Really? I chatted up a girl in a disco in 1974, she said "you won't get in my knickers I'm a lesbian!"

I said "Lesbian? What do you mean?"

She said, "See that girl over there, I could lick her arse!"

I said "Christ, I must be a lesbian as well then!"

?

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