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First Person Sentenced for 'Controlling Behaviour in an Intimate Relationship' in the UK


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BH I think you are making light of a huge problem. Controlling behaviour is not just being occasionally critical or cruel. It's a method of destroying another human being. Slowly drip by drip over tim

It reminds me of Educating Rita...she was married & worked as a hair dresser ..her old man wanted the stereotypical family & sat night in the pub having a sing song with the family...she wasnt

These 'man up and show her who's boss comments' are all well and good but the article paints this bloke as vulnerable due to his condition...I sure as hell ain't gonna look down on the bloke for not c

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7 hours ago, ChrisJones said:

Kay. Would the new law have made any difference to your circumstances, in your opinion?

It might do in this day & age   but back then it would be a domestic & unless he had beaten me to a pulp & hospitalised me then no , you wouldnt report rape in them days let alone a bullying husband 

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Have not gone through the whole thread, read the first few posts........let me give you my astute legal opinion of this law:

Its bollocks !

But hey,  even a complete idiot knows that once you start imposing legal sanction on people based on how they make another person feel then the gates are wide f***ing open for any type of shit law......

You wanted it, you got it........enjoy ! 

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11 hours ago, jukel123 said:

The new law has brought the issue into the public domain and pushed the refresh button.:sad: I would be bluffing if  I  pretended to be familiar with 60 odd laws. Whatever the difference between this new law  and the old laws are..I am all for it even if only one person benefits from it.

See, there’s the banana skin.....we can all look at personal situations and think “ohh, there should be a law about that to protect me” but actually, no there f***ing shouldn’t.

A law that totally open to the interpretation of the person applying it is bad law, and new laws made when there are already laws that cover the criminal actions of people are also bad laws.

So a law that saves “just one person” is not necessarily a good law because it could well be abused in 200 other cases.

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Just now, TOMO said:

cheers wilf.... i get it now......:thumbs:...i honestly didnt know what sheldon  was banging on about yesterday.....:icon_redface:

My god mate, you know it’s a sad state of affairs when I am bringing some clarity to the situation !! :laugh:

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19 hours ago, Kay said:

100 % spot on John, I can only draw from personal experience & I couldn't confide in anybody because I knew he would make my life a misery if I did. & I didnt know if he would harm the kids, that unspoken threat loomed over me 24/7 ... I think people think you have to be beaten to a pulp for it to be abuse & control issue.

Things like him hiding my sons asthma meds & then them re appearing & him saying it was there all the time & it was my hormones & my baby brain.... he stood over me while I ate, he prepared food & he went through the bins incase I had had something he knew nothing about ... if i wasnt in at lunch time when he came home I was in for a night of abuse off him. i had to wear what he said... have my hair how he said.... eat what he said... 

He stood behind me almost every day with his hands on my neck & put enough pressure on my neck to let me know he was boss.... it only stopped when my lad got physically strong enough to floor him.... he had lost the control then so he moved on thank god

I worked at the pub cleaning & on a friday he would be waiting at 12.30 when i knocked off to have my wages off me for food.... he would buy a carrier of food  & spend the rest on cider.... my mom fed my youngest most days while the abuse was at its worst .... my parents knew nothing about the abuse because the perps are the model parent & husband to the outside world 

I had no money & no place to run to its abuse & control....one thing I do know he is such a coward & couldnt face meeting me at his grandsons 1st birthday tea..... so he fell out with the lad over a petty issue he had about his dog & my lad not wanting the baby in the same room as a hyper springer ... all he asked was his dad put the dog in the kitchen for half hour & it resulted in a nasty letter where he threatened my lads Mrs with harm .

I would do time for the b*****d now , I aint the same person I was then 

 

I hope this don’t get taken the wrong way because it’s just my way of speaking, but here go’s :

Do you really believe that women and men need a law to save them in case they are so blind as to marry an immature, childish, small minded, cruel little prick?

I look at these things in telly sometimes where a woman has a very jealous boyfriend or such like.......you can see it before they open their mouth and you think “ If you shacked up with this moron then you have to be a bit slow yourself?” 

I mean, a bloke who has jealousy or controlling issues would normally display some signs early on......they ain’t gentleman James Bond one minute and then “Nil by Mouth” the next.

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14 minutes ago, Born Hunter said:

Well I thought we had this about concluded with a cease fire.....

 

..... but now WILF's here we're probably good for another 10 pages! :laugh:

Not me, to quote a famous phrase, "I'm out". With Wilf here things could get very dark. Pun intended.:D

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55 minutes ago, jukel123 said:

Not me, to quote a famous phrase, "I'm out". With Wilf here things could get very dark. Pun intended.:D

You have hurt my feelings.......if you are not careful I may have to resort to legal recourse! 

:air_kiss:

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I don't agree with this law, it isn't something you can legislate on imo as to a degree it happens in 99% of relationships. I think in schools instead of teaching kids they might be homosexuals we should be showing them how to treat the opposite sex and about what a healthy relationship should be like. Of course all this should be learned at home but sadly not many functioning families around these days

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43 minutes ago, John d said:

Everybody is different and everybody has the right to protection in whatever way they need it. Unfortunately not everyone is a straight talking, cockney geezer wannabe like yourself who can protect himself at all times. Yes the average person can see that this is not a law they will need, but out the 50 million odd on these shores someone will benefit from it. 

I’ll ignore your silly attempt at a dig will I And go on to say I think you are deliberately missing the point.......Is the “someone” these type of laws benefit worth the cost of the MANY it may potentially abuse?

To put it in layman’s terms, we have laws that prevent physical harm to another, we have divorce courts that take mental abuse Into account........do we need a law that protects people from making mistakes or indeed being stupid enough to stay with these type of characters.

We have a social welfare system that provides (all be it not a lot I grant you) but there is that safety net.......everyone has a front door, everyone can leave if things are really that bad.

Do we  really need a law to replace your responsibility to yourself and maybe your kids? 

Should we be prosecuting on behalf of someone who has low self worth and if so, what are the criteria ?

Ones persons mental abuse is another persons banter......where do the goal posts sit? 

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