forest of dean redneck 11,183 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 28 minutes ago, socks said: I fed them with a 17HMR ? ...... Peppered?? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
green lurchers 16,368 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 (edited) Gin bar still open Edited March 2, 2018 by green lurchers 2 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
samboy 275 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 I see that cocktail waitress training you done has stood you in well gl . 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 It's been snowing all night. So the morning goes like this; 8:00 I made a snowman. 8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman. 8:15 So, I made a snow woman. 8:17 The nanny of the neighbours complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest. 8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead. 8:25 The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with. 8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white. 8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf. 8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on. 8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Certainly, if it's up your arse" 8:45 TV news crew from the BBC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am called a sexist. 8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being handcuffed and taken to the police station in a marked van. 9:00 I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather. 9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices. 9:29 A little-known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot. Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the world in which we live today! 1 1 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
green lurchers 16,368 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 (edited) 10 minutes ago, W. Katchum said: That’s camper than a row a pink tents in a faggots only camping site mate I thought you were a good guy but you just went down in my books fcuking gin, that’s a whoores drink ? Nothing wrong with Bottle of gin before beer o,clock ☃️⛄️ W⚓️ Edited March 2, 2018 by green lurchers 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 Also called a "mothers ruin" 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
green lurchers 16,368 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 1 minute ago, W. Katchum said: My ole granny god bless her soul drank gin an my granda who was a funny guy to say the least used to always say ‘it’s a whoores drink that’ ? used to steal odd sip an it was shite, like drinking perfume I’d rather dehydrate than touch that shite again? Give a decent bottle with fevertree tonic a go you enjoy it while your eating your salad lol 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,094 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 I'm with you GL... gin and fever tree.. very nice... I've succumb to a pint of Guinness in front of the fire...it just feels right lol 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
green lurchers 16,368 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 Just now, scothunter said: Also called a "mothers ruin" It’s got plenty of history wrapped round it for sure Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,094 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 1 minute ago, green lurchers said: Give a decent bottle with fevertree tonic a go you enjoy it while your eating your salad lol Got to be fever tree.. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
socks 32,253 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 4 hours ago, NEWKID said: This is the track out of our place.. and the Mrs and sausage dog enjoying a sledge lol My road looks the same mate .... 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,094 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 1 minute ago, W. Katchum said: Aye he used that un aswell haha? have ye heard of it being called a whoores drink mate? Or was it just his way a calling her a cow? he had a cracking way a words an i was an orange b*****d till day he does an many a day out a spite is wear a rangers strip to annoy him an he would make me sit on doorstep till me ma was leaving again, ?I’d be happy he was annoyed an he would be happy for barring me for house ??? what a childhood eh??? My grandad was a proper character mate.. a wiry Irishman who earnt and spent a fortune on drink.. ended up tee total back in Ireland.. I was about 14 when I saw met him "properly".. he used to pull an ice cream cart out onto the sea front in his town, he was around 70ish ...i queued for an ice cream.. got to the front.. "hello Grandad".., he jumped out of the window and started shadow boxing around me!! I didn't know if to shake his hand or chin him lol 2 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 26,094 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 Just now, socks said: My road looks the same mate .... Send the Mrs down it on a sledge mate... they love it lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest edrd Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 (edited) ? Edited March 3, 2018 by edrd Quote Link to post Share on other sites
green lurchers 16,368 Posted March 2, 2018 Report Share Posted March 2, 2018 6 minutes ago, NEWKID said: Got to be fever tree.. Bought a nice gin in the USA couldn’t believe they done the tree to go with it ? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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