Funny Joke Thread

[trigger2 3,100]

9 hours ago, si brown said:

Took me a second or 2 before I got that. About the 4th time of reading it the penny dropped

[kinkell 787]

3 minutes ago, trigger2 said:

Took me a second or 2 before I got that. About the 4th time of reading it the penny dropped

 

Edited March 27, 2020 by kinkell
Mistake

[bob.243 7,526]

[vfr400boy 3,120]

Afternoon all! Just a heads up, if you get an email from the Department for Health saying not to eat tinned pork because it contains Covid-19 ignore it. It’s spam.

[EDDIE B 3,120]

 

[martyn2233 2,165]

https://m.(!64.56:886/jitc.jitz.5/videos/2608726122706363/

[jetro 5,349]

A handful of 7-year-old children were asked, 'What they thought of beer.' .....

'I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer he drinks the prettier my mom gets.' --Tim, 7 years old 

'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we want on television when he is asleep, so beer is nice.' --Melanie, 7 years old 

'My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn't think this is very funny.' --Grady, 7 years old 

'My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and the more they drink the more they give kisses to each other, which is a good thing.' --Toby, 7 year old 

'My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He also wets his pants sometimes, so he shouldn't have too much.' --Sarah, 7 years old 

'My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, the better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.' --Lilly, 7 years old 

'I don't like beer very much. Every time Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they taste disgusting.' --Ethan, 7 years old 

'I give Dad's beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.' --Shirley, 7 years old 

AND THE BEST RESPONSE: 

'My Mom drinks beer and she says silly things and picks on my father. Whenever she drinks beer she yells at Dad and tells him to go bury his bone down the street again, but that doesn't make any sense.' --Jack, 7 years old

[bob.243 7,526]

Poor Charlie.

[cragman 2,635]

[cragman 2,635]

[Foxpack 2 7,848]

[ArchieHood 3,692]

 

[Arry 18,578]

Free to a good home Border Collie. Not house trained, shit with children, and quite frankly , a vicious little b*****d.

Cheers Arry

[forest of dean redneck 11,189]

[EDDIE B 3,120]