perthshire keeper 1,237 Posted September 12, 2013 Report Share Posted September 12, 2013 Yep. That was a goat too. I remember that one. FFS. Imagine glancing out the window and there's some c**t bang at it, with a goat, in broad daylight! Best bit is, as I remember it, he shuffled it round the corner of a bit of board, to try and carry on with a bit of privacy!!! have you ever tried stopping in mid swing! when your that far in you may as well finish 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WILF 44,276 Posted September 12, 2013 Report Share Posted September 12, 2013 They nicked an old boy round here once for going to one of those city farms and giving a pig one !!!......in the report it said he was all suited and booted on the top but naked from the waste down when they caught him balls deep in bacon !! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
reaper1064 285 Posted September 12, 2013 Report Share Posted September 12, 2013 Guy in India got banged up for shagging his baby elephant, he reckoned it was a re incarnation of his dead wife so he had a legal right to smash it's back doors in. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
perthshire keeper 1,237 Posted September 12, 2013 Report Share Posted September 12, 2013 Guy in India got banged up for shagging his baby elephant, he reckoned it was a re incarnation of his dead wife so he had a legal right to smash it's back doors in. that is out standing! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Outlaw Pete 2,224 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 Know what, Max? My initial reaction to your comment there was that you seemed to be going in a little heavy. " It was only a goat! ", I thought ..... Then, that sparked a deep memory, from long years ago ..... Ye know how Google can lead from one thing to another? There were a pair of ranking Sex Experts, back in the day. Man and a woman. Dr's, probably. Just can't place the bloody names now. But, they were as well known as Crosby and Hope. These two were discussing the clitoris and back door entry while fellatio was still illegal, between blacks and whites in Carolina. It was the guys take on 'Bestiality' that caught my eye though. I read an essay by him, covering the subject. It was written almost as if the reader were sat at a dining table with him. Enjoying a good, red wine. His angle was Very much in the tone of; " Well ..... what If a guy strays from the path some time? Dips his wick in a sheep or goat? (Snigger!) Doesn't make Him an animal. Does it? I mean, okay; If the guy's a ravening, out and out Goat F**ker? Then we may perceive that he has a problem! But, just trying a bit of forbidden fruit? Just for shits and giggles ....? Should we Really see such a huge problem in that? " So on and so forth. This guy had Been There!!! It was so f**king patently obvious that he was using his Professional capacity to smooth over the fact that his own cock had once smelt of goat! Swear to god, if I could only track down that old paper again! It was f**king hysterical! Have you personally stimulated a womans 'Clitoris' with your tongue, Doctor? 'Yes!'. Have you engaged in Anal Intercourse, with a willing, female partner, Doctor? 'Yes!' Doctor ..... Have you Ever slipped a Goat a f**king crippler?!? 'Snort! Giggle ..... Not Saying!!! ' 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jigsaw 11,809 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 The minute I saw the heading i knew I was going to get a mention,lol,,if i had the gun in that barn,the goat would have been safe......for a while any way.dirty tramp. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BIG G wheton machine 1,594 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 a lot on this thread has been funny lol. but fellas im worried at what some people get up too, onions deep in animals is just a start what other sick fantasies will these loony bin escapees act out when the notion takes them ? im also worried about the people who are searching for all the weirdos to post them on here, they say serial killers like to return to the scene of the crime, lololol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
forest of dean redneck 11,189 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 Bet they gave him a job on the prison farm as well. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
stewie 3,387 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 imagine the conversation with his new pad mate............... pad mate: how you doing goat f****r: not bad mate, you??? pad mate: yeah all good, glad to have a new pad mate tho, the last one was a right freak, he was in here for running round naked in his local tescos with a machete shouting "allah akbar" even tho he is jewish!! oh well at least you look normal mate, what in for??? goat f****r: f***ing a goat pad mate: FFS 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Frann 882 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 imagine the conversation with his new pad mate............... pad mate: how you doing goat f****r: not bad mate, you??? pad mate: yeah all good, glad to have a new pad mate tho, the last one was a right freak, he was in here for running round naked in his local tescos with a machete shouting "allah akbar" even tho he is jewish!! oh well at least you look normal mate, what in for??? goat f****r: f*****g a goat pad mate: FFS LOL Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gak25 16 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 He will be Billy no mates from now on lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
stewie 3,387 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 apparently the goat has forgiven its rapist and has teamed up with taylor swift to record a song about the goat f****r in the hope he will listen and change his ways.........sneak preview below......... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bayV3wez50 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Matt 160 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 The local paper here showed a picture of a goat (in case anyone didn't know what it looked like) with it's face blanked out We shouldn't joke about it. The victim was, after all, someone's kid... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dusk til dawn 169 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 As old scagger lee said to the judge "its a life innit when ya cant do what ya want wid ya own bits a things " Quote Link to post Share on other sites
whippet 99 2,613 Posted September 13, 2013 Report Share Posted September 13, 2013 Your all quick to condemn him , but has any one seen a photo of the goat ? for all we know it could of been a stunner , one of those with the come hither eyes , the proud bearing , the shapely hind quarters , the long elegant neck , the sleek , shiny ,glossy fur . It could have acted flirtatiously in front of him , flaunting herself , accidently on purpose brushing up against his genitals , laughing at his jokes , suggestively lying on a straw bale . Give the man a break until you know the full story . got touch on reading that........... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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