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Outlaw Pete

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Everything posted by Outlaw Pete

  1. Millet; Live, or dried? I'm assuming live then? Paul; Lend me your sparrows! I'll ring the f**king lot of them! (Been going great guns on them, round here, this last few weeks too. If it's there? They'll try eating it!)
  2. Well; The Irish lads needn't give a f**k, anyway
  3. Nice idea, about the spoon, mate. Only ~ I don't know what hatches nests are like, inside but; Swallows have these really grippy little feet, on these nasty, short little legs. And they're the absolute f**kers for gripping the animal hair and feathers the nest is usually lined with. Start trying to scrape Them out with a spoon? Soon find the rings won't stay on ....! Know what I'm saying? Ring sizes? Yeah, I know, mate. I'd use an E ring on, say, a collared dove! Utter chaos, you and me trying to work together. " 'Ere, Fires, bung us an E ring, mate .......... What The
  4. I've just ringed a nest full of half grown swallows. F**king murder, getting them out of the nest, without breaking it up. Then, shoving them all back in there? It's like stuffing five more students into a phone box! But, those little f**kers will be three times their size, and still cramming in there! It's mental what birds do. Oh, and ring size E?! F**k off! It's A for a goldie and B for a house sparrow! Ask Mr Wilkes!
  5. F**k it, Gem; Ye beat me to it! That's exactly what I came in here to say. Well, I s'pose at least we now have a bloke saying it too
  6. Is There any other, mate? All was working fine. Yeah? Now, it's f**ked. Someone must have touched Something. Internet doesn't just blow in here and f**k shit up. Never happens on my Blog. Only I f**k shit up there. By Doing something. Now, we just wait for some smarmy c*** to come along and explain how this was all due to sun spot activity. No one'd touched anything. And Pete is the only c*** round here. Yeah. Right. Believe who ye choose ..... Pssst! Wanna see an Incredible pair of jugs, on a islamic chick ....? PM me. Or I'll disappear too .....
  7. They've f**ked about with and f**ked up AGAIN. Simple's
  8. Is The Hound f**k as like dead! If he was dead, she'd have f**king Killed him ~ the blonde maggot, I mean. (Sorry; I'm so f**king deaf I don't manage to catch half their names) Love her to bits though (The Maggot)! Absolutely bonded to her Word! Faithful as a Dog. Anyone ever hurts her? I'll f**king hate their character for ever! The Hound too; What a f**king character! If I was six foot f**ck. Built like a brick shit house. And able to fight like that ....? Well; At least the language would come naturally!
  9. They'd rather leave it to The Professionals .....
  10. Thanks a f**king Lot for reminding me of that! FFS! Now I need to get blind drunk again, just to try and erase the image!
  11. Saw a great cartoon somewhere, once ..... Bird, laying on a psychiatrists couch. Bird's saying: " My mother used to throw up into my mouth "
  12. So; Do both 'parents' usually feed chicks? And, is it done by regurgitation?
  13. I did do, one time. F**king GSD following some thirteen year old girl about the streets. Decided it wanted some of mine and there's her just smirking as she denies the thing's anything to do with her. It was a right f**king situation. The thing wouldn't actually get to grips. But, I knew, if I dragged mine away, it'd be on their backs. Let my male off, to f**k its shit up? Well; We all know where That would lead to! So, I considered I had no choice. I rang the Police and said I wished to report a Dog Attack. Figured they could have a word with the adults, who were probably entirely un
  14. What the f**king hell's that in ye pocket, Phil?! Or are ye Really pleased with that pup?!
  15. " Evolve " ....? Yeppers. That's what it did, mate. It Evolved. Started 'evolving', after about the seventh or eighth pint ~ like it do ..... Taken me Days to get round to actually Creating it. (Yes. I think that's a nice word) The Creation took a minute or two longer than it took me to go to the other room and fetch the bits in. What a shame I haven't got an ebay account though. I could offer my one. Then, your own advert could point mine out, saying; " Don't accept inferior imitations! " F**k me! That'd be some savage craic!
  16. Millet; Ye not supposed to hold them by the throat when ye feed them! Actually; One of the most incredible stories I'll ever read; Young girl and her bloke are walking through a park, yeah? Then come across, on the footpath, what the photo suggested to be a few day old chick, about the size of ye thumb nail. Now, this girl had never read the book. She decided; " F**k this! It's fell out of a nest? I'll take it home and look after it. " Stupid? Futile? An impulse born of total ignorance of the way of things? Yep. Ye'd think so. Except that later photo's showed a perfectly forme
  17. Well, so inspired was I by this thread that I decided I should have a go myself! Here's my effort, lads. I hope ye like it! Just Look At The Detail! What ye reckon, boys? Worth a punt on the bay?
  18. No. Your avatar will be banned, because Aldi aren't paying Google their cut .....
  19. Massive Respect and Kudos to who ever the hell originally typed This out! It sure as hell wasn't me! " Firstly, imagine every time within a day that football is mentioned by someone else. Secondly, replace it with something that you don't want to hear about every day. Say... Archaeology. Then, think carefully about how an average day would pan out. So, you awaken to the clock radio. It's 7AM. Just as you awaken, it's time for the news and archaeology already. Not news and other historical investigations, like library restorations or museum openings (unless there's ano
  20. Aidy; I could sell a glass of water to a drowning man But; I'd first have to Know that this was the best water Ever, bar none. Now, Mr Wilkes there bought into my sales pitch. So much so that he put his money where his mouth is. And, if you could see the PM's that have just passed between us? Ye'd see how much Absolute delight his progression is generating for Both of us! I'm bouncing off the walls, for him, here! This is possibly an even greater pleasure than I find in ringing, myself. Seeing someone else discover what I share in. " Go for it "? Please do! And Stick At I
  21. I have been known to knock up the odd drop of stout .....
  22. Can't drive, myself. But, years and years ago, I was chatting to a bloke in a pub. Just a decent seeming, every day bloke. He asked if I wanted a lift home. That was fine by me. I was a couple of miles out. We walked outside and I thought I was on a secret camera TV show! This f**king Thing was lurking there. Awaiting his command. Full on f**king Lamborghini !!! And, yes, the old mouth Did go a bit dry!
  23. :icon_eek: Spadist; WTF was up with me, last night?!? I was patently in a rage about something or other. Yet, I can't remember a damn thing! Strange! Breaking Bad? Yeah. Excellent! Definitely set to go down as one of the classics. Sopranos and The Wire are two epics that every man should see before he dies. I have both the boxed sets here. They've held their value, on Amazon, since Forever! That's testament to them, right there.
  24. Ask me later, mate. Anything I type, in my present level of incandescence, would only make me ban bait! GOT time, methinks!
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