PLEDGEY 493 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 So I'm talking to a mate today. He says ''You ain't gonna' believe what my stupid step son did''. I asked what was up and it goes like this. '' I got home last night and the Mrs and her son are looking a little upset (the son is 18 by the way) so I asked what was wrong. She says that the son was driving along with his mate out near Othery (this is countryside territory)and something ran out in the road. He heard a bang so stopped to have a look. They walked back and could see a cat in the grass, it was still alive as its tail was moving. He didn't want it to suffer so he gets something out the boot and twats the cat over the head a couple of times. As he's doing this a PCO pulls up to see what is going on. They explain and the Copper asks if the car is O.K. He says he hasn't looked. They go and look at the front of the car and there's another cat, dead, with its head and neck jammed in the bumper. He only killed a good cat''. I'm like ''FUUUCK OOOOOF!, Your takin' the piss!!!!'' He says I swear to God it's true. Now he ain't the sort of person to bullshit so I can only take his word for it. As I'm typing I'm thinking this sounds too good to be real. I'm gonna' ask him again tomorrow just to double double check he ain't got the wrong end of the stick or some thing. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 4 minutes ago, PLEDGEY said: So I'm talking to a mate today. He says ''You ain't gonna' believe what my stupid step son did''. I asked what was up and it goes like this. '' I got home last night and the Mrs and her son are looking a little upset (the son is 18 by the way) so I asked what was wrong. She says that the son was driving along with his mate out near Othery (this is countryside territory)and something ran out in the road. He heard a bang so stopped to have a look. They walked back and could see a cat in the grass, it was still alive as its tail was moving. He didn't want it to suffer so he gets something out the boot and twats the cat over the head a couple of times. As he's doing this a PCO pulls up to see what is going on. They explain and the Copper asks if the car is O.K. He says he hasn't looked. They go and look at the front of the car and there's another cat, dead, with its head and neck jammed in the bumper. He only killed a good cat''. I'm like ''FUUUCK OOOOOF!, Your takin' the piss!!!!'' He says I swear to God it's true. Now he ain't the sort of person to bullshit so I can only take his word for it. As I'm typing I'm thinking this sounds too good to be real. I'm gonna' ask him again tomorrow just to double double check he ain't got the wrong end of the stick or some thing. My old man told me that same story 15 + year ago Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kanny 19,129 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 Don't know if I'm being thick but I don't get it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 To be fair he still tells it to this day ...along with his paddy and Murphy jokes . Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PLEDGEY 493 Posted January 10, 2018 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 Just now, Navek said: My old man told me that same story 15 + year ago I know, I've heard similar as well. But he swears it's true. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 Just now, PLEDGEY said: I know, I've heard similar as well. But he swears it's true. It may well be. It would make the joke a lot more funny if it really did happen to him ?? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 4 minutes ago, kanny said: Don't know if I'm being thick but I don't get it. He got out and killed the wrong cat .he thought the cat at side road was the cat he hit with the car so he clubbed it ..turns round and the cat he did hit is stuck in the bumper/grill Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kanny 19,129 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 Penny has dropped ....doh! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kanny 19,129 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 1 minute ago, Navek said: He got out and killed the wrong cat .he thought the cat at side road was the cat he hit with the cat so he clubbed it ..turns round and the cat he did hit is stuck in the bumper/grill Good cat threw me ....is there such a thing lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 3 minutes ago, kanny said: Good cat threw me ....is there such a thing lol I’ve had a couple good pussies Quote Link to post Share on other sites
wilbur foxhound 480 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 5 minutes ago, Navek said: I’ve had a couple good pussies Did you club them Quote Link to post Share on other sites
neil cooney 10,413 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 It's an old one. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 30 minutes ago, wilbur foxhound said: Did you club them Sure did ? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TOMO 24,781 Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 its an old joke.....but hes cocked it up telling it.... i was driving my car down a lane when a cat runs out......bang......i stop the car...get out look round and see an old tatty cat laid on the verge......i must do the right thing and pts...so u get out a wheel brace...and administer the coupe de grace.....at that point an old lady comes running out the cottage protesting ive killed her faithfull old moggy....i explain that it was the kindest thing......no she says hes been laying asleep on the verge all morning.....after inspecting the car i find a cat wedged in the grill... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Navek Posted January 10, 2018 Report Share Posted January 10, 2018 1 minute ago, TOMO said: its an old joke.....but hes cocked it up telling it.... i was driving my car down a lane when a cat runs out......bang......i stop the car...get out look round and see an old tatty cat laid on the verge......i must do the right thing and pts...so u get out a wheel brace...and administer the coupe de grace.....at that point an old lady comes running out the cottage protesting ive killed her faithfull old moggy....i explain that it was the kindest thing......no she says hes been laying asleep on the verge all morning.....after inspecting the car i find a cat wedged in the grill... That’s the f***ing one ??? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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