Eating Moles

[Guest Ditch_Shitter]

'The little muscle men' ~ as my old mate and wayside gourmet, Chris H. once assured me ~ are about the Last thing in the british countryside one wants to go putting in ones mouth.

 

His expression, as he relived that moment of experimentation, makes me shudder to this day! Chris would Try eating just about any and everything he ever killed. Moles, he discovered, are most Definately Off The Menu! :sick:

[Butler 396]

Nothing eats the little fuckers just look how long they last hung on a fence i don't even think maggots eat them :sick:

[trappa 517]

even the ferrets leave em alone - they must be feckin rank :sick:

[mole catcher 1]

DITCHY,........I dont know if your mate deserves a medal for trying to eat a mole or weither he needs locking up for his own safety :sick:

 

On the sublect of moles, i once had one fall out of my trapping bag and didnt notice it had slipped under the back seat of the astra estate i had at the time. it was the middle of summer and i tell you, the smell was fecking horrid. i would be driving round and this smell would waft up my nose every now and then. nothing to bad in the first few days but after the second week i was a little bit worried as to what was causing it. i emptied all the boot, cleaned the upholstry just in case one of the kids had stuck something nasty down the back. the last straw was as i was driving along on my rounds and the smell hit me. the wife refussed to get in the car and that was a week ago but this day it hit me hard. so hard i pulled over got out the car and threw up :sick: :sick:

so there and then i set to the car with spanners to remove all seats to see if i could find what the smell was. i was like a madman on the side of the road ripping seats out, god only knows what other drivers must have thought. Any way, i removeed the back seat and there it was stearing at me, a bloody mole well, i can only discribe what it looked like as this....... ever seen a puffer fish on tv? thats what it looked like, all bloated to about the size of a tennis ball with a stumpy arm at each corner.

the worse bit was as i tryed to lift it,i found it had welded itself to the floor so when i pulled at it the skin tore and i heard the sound of the gas escaping :sick: :sick: :sick: that was it, i was done, i puked like ive never puked before, even the dogs in the back behind the dog gaurd started to gag i tell you.

the smell was a bugger to get rid of, so much so that when it came to sell it, a prospective buyer asked "" COR... you like the smell of air freashner dont you?"

i had to bite my lip as i nearly replied" its smells better than 2 week old dead moles mate""

so nexttime you see an advert for a car that reads "" one carefull owner"" just ask him if hes a molecatcher

Edited September 15, 2007 by mole catcher

[dannyboy1 2]

DITCHY,........I dont know if your mate deserves a medal for trying to eat a mole or weither he needs locking up for his own safety :sick:

 

On the sublect of moles, i once had one fall out of my trapping bag and didnt notice it had slipped under the back seat of the astra estate i had at the time. it was the middle of summer and i tell you, the smell was fecking horrid. i would be driving round and this smell would waft up my nose every now and then. nothing to bad in the first few days but after the second week i was a little bit worried as to what was causing it. i emptied all the boot, cleaned the upholstry just in case one of the kids had stuck something nasty down the back. the last straw was as i was driving along on my rounds and the smell hit me. the wife refussed to get in the car and that was a week ago but this day it hit me hard. so hard i pulled over got out the car and threw up :sick: :sick:

so there and then i set to the car with spanners to remove all seats to see if i could find what the smell was. i was like a madman on the side of the road ripping seats out, god only knows what other drivers must have thought. Any way, i removeed the back seat and there it was stearing at me, a bloody mole well, i can only discribe what it looked like as this....... ever seen a puffer fish on tv? thats what it looked like, all bloated to about the size of a tennis ball with a stumpy arm at each corner.

the worse bit was as i tryed to lift it,i found it had welded itself to the floor so when i pulled at it the skin tore and i heard the sound of the gas escaping :sick: :sick: :sick: that was it, i was done, i puked like ive never puked before, even the dogs in the back behind the dog gaurd started to gag i tell you.

the smell was a bugger to get rid of, so much so that when it came to sell it, a prospective buyer asked "" COR... you like the smell of air freashner dont you?"

i had to bite my lip as i nearly replied" its smells better than 2 week old dead moles mate""

so nexttime you see an advert for a car that reads "" one carefull owner"" just ask him if hes a molecatcher

thank you so much....i havent laughed like that in a long time

[gardener 0]

And there was me thinking the dead vole under my computer smelled bad! Thank * it wasn't a mole

[Guest Ditch_Shitter]

Ohh jesus h christ, MC! And I could've told ye the bugger would come apart when he'd got like that; But I couldn't have suggested any way of handling it! Maybe full face Respirator on and a powerful yet disposable hoover?! :sick:

 

Actually, it's for similar reasons that I always 'bag up' any dead rodents I pick up on clients properties. I carry plastic butchers meat bags and pop them into those and tie them off. Know what though? A ripe rat can still stink a motor out, even through a tightly tied plastic bag! As I discovered when being taken home with one in my foot well :sick: Niether of us said anything, but I felt f*ckin terrible! Christ! I can smell it now! :sick: :sick: :sick:

 

Snap on lidded plastic bucket's the best I've come up with. Only open the thing in a stiff breeze, when ever possible!

 

 

Gardener; You sure that wasn't an old Mouse ye found under ye PC ( Sorry. It had to be said)

[Guest Magwitch]

These one's look tasty :sick: :sick: :sick:

[mad al 146]

Ditch, who the feck wants to eat a mole . Made me think back to when I was a lad (BC ), we caught, killed, grilled a lizard and...................ate it :laugh: , I liked snakes then too :icon_eek: , these days..................... :sick: :sick: :sick: ..........Al :drink:

[moley 115]

every year i loose moles and traps to badgers and the occasional fox , the foxes usually just roll on the body , but alot of times the badgers eat them and leave me a bloody trap

[gardener 0]

Gardener; You sure that wasn't an old Mouse ye found under ye PC (rolleyes.gif Sorry. It had to be said)

 

I think I can tell the difference by now.....

[Guest Ditch_Shitter]

Aye; One has two balls. The other has three!

[Bosun11 537]

DITCHY,........I dont know if your mate deserves a medal for trying to eat a mole or weither he needs locking up for his own safety :sick:

 

On the sublect of moles, i once had one fall out of my trapping bag and didnt notice it had slipped under the back seat of the astra estate i had at the time. it was the middle of summer and i tell you, the smell was fecking horrid. i would be driving round and this smell would waft up my nose every now and then. nothing to bad in the first few days but after the second week i was a little bit worried as to what was causing it. i emptied all the boot, cleaned the upholstry just in case one of the kids had stuck something nasty down the back. the last straw was as i was driving along on my rounds and the smell hit me. the wife refussed to get in the car and that was a week ago but this day it hit me hard. so hard i pulled over got out the car and threw up :sick: :sick:

so there and then i set to the car with spanners to remove all seats to see if i could find what the smell was. i was like a madman on the side of the road ripping seats out, god only knows what other drivers must have thought. Any way, i removeed the back seat and there it was stearing at me, a bloody mole well, i can only discribe what it looked like as this....... ever seen a puffer fish on tv? thats what it looked like, all bloated to about the size of a tennis ball with a stumpy arm at each corner.

the worse bit was as i tryed to lift it,i found it had welded itself to the floor so when i pulled at it the skin tore and i heard the sound of the gas escaping :sick: :sick: :sick: that was it, i was done, i puked like ive never puked before, even the dogs in the back behind the dog gaurd started to gag i tell you.

the smell was a bugger to get rid of, so much so that when it came to sell it, a prospective buyer asked "" COR... you like the smell of air freashner dont you?"

i had to bite my lip as i nearly replied" its smells better than 2 week old dead moles mate""

so nexttime you see an advert for a car that reads "" one carefull owner"" just ask him if hes a molecatcher

 

a great read MC....one that really 'states your name'.

 

Just off the subject a little....... When selling 'our type' of vehicles..... Once owned a very...very reliable Renault, 19 TD model, this car went everywere.....from 'tricky' parking spots high up on the Lakeland Fells (following different packs) to being used like a Sube over rough ground in pursute of all manner of critter......well time came (bout 100k+ of my own miles) to say goodbye, now I had been using this 'bus' daily for 8 years and (to my standards then) gave it a damn good clean pre-sale, two blokes come to view.....do the usual walk around and tyre kick (I feckin hate tyre kickers!) an look interested.......'Jump in' say's I an give it a spin (to be honest the car did drive excellent dispite high, (an rough) milage).......As they were about to get in, for some strange reason (as i didn't notice when cleaning?) I 'got on' to the back seat.......blood stains running in lines all down it.....then up to the roof..... blood splats feckin everywhere, proper 'Hammer House Of Horror' car !!!

First bloke in......"you had dog's in this car mate", he 'immediatley' asks.......second blokes in and shuts the door........" Do they f****n live in it"!!!......an with that, takes a 'real big' sniff, gag's and pukes up :sick: , right on my 'newly polished' dash!!..... These days I spend so much more time cleaning my vehicles after a trip out..........

Any one else had the same problems???

Edited September 16, 2007 by Bosun11