mackem 23,675 Posted July 2, 2011 Report Share Posted July 2, 2011 Yesterday was the 1'st of july,f*ck I hate the first day of the month,time to settle bills,debits,mortgage the whole kit'n'kaboodle,wasnt it Mr Micawber who said "Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery."?My expenditure certainly exceeds my income but thats life.I was en-route to HSBC to pay off something or other when I passed the bookies,my mate Clever Trevor works there,he is a male version of Carol Vorderman,not in looks,but he can do sums without using his fingers,not that he hasnt got fingers to use,he actually has the full complement of digits,he just chooses not to use them when counting,impressive stuff.There was a crowd in the bank so I doubled back to spend a few minutes chewing the fat with clever trevor and to let the bank queue die down. Its always good to see Trev,he can chat enough to send a glass eye to sleep but its all interesting stuff.He told me about the odd bets random nutters place,totally obscure stuff like Lucky Lord Lucan and Jimmy Hoffa being caught in flagrante delicto inside Shergars stables,what sort of fruitcake would wager their hard-earned on such a random happenstance? I had a wad of notes bulging in my pocket,destined for the HSBC i knew,but I suddenly had an inspirational lightbulb moment I asked CT the odds on a litter of internet sold lurcher pups making legend status,canine stardom,a place in running dog history."About a million to one" said trev "Is that the best you can do?" "A million and seven"? he ceded?Who could resist?"Can I have a tenner on that?" "Ten quid?" "No mate,ten large!" He reminded me that to actually be classed a legend the pup needed to be remembered 100 years hence,i will have long since popped my clogs and be pushing up daisies but trev assured me he would personally see my descendents got the cash . True legends like tedwaters enter the world not mewling or whimpering softly but herald their arrival with a roar of rage,I painted Trev a picture of a future shaped by the tedwater saga,petfood giant Chum marketing a Tedwater BARF meal,Tedwater-timeshares whereby a person could have their Tedwater for a week in January to run the big-country or for a fortnight in october for ferreting,I told him the Tedwaters lineage could be traced way back to their sire and dam and that all the pups were guaranteed to take pre-ban H/F/D,trev's eyes glazed over as he pictured the legend ,a glimpse though a tear in the space-time continuum,a portal in time that showed a tedwater future,I left Trevor buried deep in thought and walked out,lighter in pocket and heart for I had bought into a legend Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted July 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 2, 2011 http://www.thehuntinglife.com/forums/topic/208984-tedwater-pup/ The legend continues Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DottyDoo 500 Posted July 2, 2011 Report Share Posted July 2, 2011 all that money an only a measley tenner...............ffs, i can vouch for the tedwater pup a legend in the making Quote Link to post Share on other sites
goldfinch2007 2,331 Posted July 2, 2011 Report Share Posted July 2, 2011 you mad fecker Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted July 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 Legends are material to be moulded,and not facts to be recorded Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tb25 4,626 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 whos would you say breed the best then? bog-water tedd-water or black-water Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted July 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 whos would you say breed the best then?bog-water tedd-water or black-water Whatever it is,its something in the water Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DottyDoo 500 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 whos would you say breed the best then?bog-water tedd-water or black-water Whatever it is,its something in the water Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fcuktheban 140 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 So if Tedd and Hancock had their own brand of dog food would it be called Tedd-cock barf? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted July 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 Tedd-cock barf? Its not going to be hyphenated,Teddd has decided upon the Tedddscock BARF brand name with a "Just chew it" slogan on the side of the tin Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fcuktheban 140 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 Tedd-cock barf? Its not going to be hyphenated,Teddd has decided upon the Tedddscock BARF brand name with a "Just chew it" slogan on the side of the tin It should be sold in an easy pour bottle. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 23,675 Posted July 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 It should be sold in an easy pour bottle. Teddd welcomes all suggestions regarding his brand-name,your idea has been forwarded to the relevant R&D department for scrutiny Teddd himself is unavailable for comment at this moment in time due to high-level meetings with Publicist Max Clifford regarding the imminent launch of his new best-seller "Tedwater-the phenomenon"(£24.99 including P&P). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fcuktheban 140 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 It should be sold in an easy pour bottle. Teddd welcomes all suggestions regarding his brand-name,your idea has been forwarded to the relevant R&D department for scrutiny Teddd himself is unavailable for comment at this moment in time due to high-level meetings with Publicist Max Clifford regarding the imminent launch of his new best-seller "Tedwater-the phenomenon"(£24.99 including P&P). Of course you'll have to give it a good shake to get the barf out. Let me know when the dvd's come out, I'm loo lazy to read an entire book Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Teddd 84 Posted July 3, 2011 Report Share Posted July 3, 2011 :whistling: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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